Highlights and favourites of my trip to Indonesia

Of course, there are so many things I learned and enjoyed during those 2 weeks. But mainly I am glad I shared those emotions with these fantastic people.



These are the times worth living for.

There were of course a whole adventure for the palate, and I am happy my stomach held everything, thanks for all the good bacterias I have accumulated all my life eating junk food on the streets.


And island hopping is definetely an exciting activity, especially when I get to see so much sun days in a row! But there were more than just beaches in Bali. Temples, crafts, so many luxurious (ahem) plants, the smell of fresh air, sensual tastes,...



I felt I was both at home and lost in the infinite universe. Time didn't stop, time didn't exist. I woke up at peace, and went to sleep content. I tried to take some actions to help the ones around me, trying not to be too much of a spectator, but really, it was also very rewarding just to watch, and feel so much emotions. I am so grateful words, a smile and warm tears are not enough to convey how I feel.




Terima kasih

D'Masiv - Cinta Ini Membunuhku

Here is a soundtrack of my past vacation in Indonesia. I listened to it on the plane and it makes me so happy it makes me smile every morning when I am waiting for the trains on a cold windy platform in London.

I Heart Robot?

Well, what a shock, after watching Zettai Kareshi, I stumble on this news:
http://news.yahoo.com/s/afp/20080615/ts_afp/lifestylenetherlandstechnologylovesexrobots_080615055138


Scary stuff...makes you think a bit about why and how we feel sometimes.

Iznogoud or Izitgoud?

Alas, I don't have that marsupilami comics around, but for sure I was torn between fear of poisononing and will to please again this morning. Like any present I try to offer, it is always a torture before getting the approval of the recipient. Imagine me baking a 'pudding' from 3 days old bread, milk, egggs and banana, and bringing it to work for my comrades...it was still warm when it got to the office, and I was in torture thinking it is disgusting and noone will eat it (since I didn't even have a chance to taste it).
This is a torture I am enduring at each gift or offering, because I usually choose it on impulse then regret or fear for its validity or value until the actual offering: is this too much? is this enough? would it be useful? will it end in the trash? is this suitable? etc...Of course there is the joy of being able to offer something, but it is only completelly fulfilled when the recipient(s) actually enjoys it...

Why the worry? I am not sure. Maybe because I just want everything to be perfect, although i never found it easy to choose the time to give the present. So I tend to slip it or throw it at them, casually, pretending I din't care,that it is not a big deal. But strangely enough, it is quite a big deal for me...vanity? or I care so much about what people think of me after all?

Ah well, they finished the cake. I will remember to collect and use old leftover baguettes from work next time.

This is a man's world

Here is a typical day at work. Obviously we all try to get to our desk on time before the hordes of clients hurriedly call us on our headset(some have wireless ones and can still sound professional in the toilets). And this is why I can never be a good fiction writer because I can nver come up with these gems:

N:-Hey I got my package!
S:-Yeah? let's see, how many did you get?
N:-Hmm, two. Chocolate and banana flavour (or was it vanilla and banana?)
U:-Wow, I can't believe you spent £100= for those. In my case I just reduce the amount I eat.
Me (unaware of things):-What? What did you get?
N:-Meal replacement powder
Me:-You mean like Slim F*ast? How much? Is that the same as powder juice like K? I hope you got more than 2 flavours because you're going to not like those flavours after 3 days! (imagine 5kg of each flavour)
N:-Well, this is supposed to be a meal on its own but I will still eat dinner and maybe fruits...
S:-But you must exercise as well, running especially. how long do you run?
N:-Well I'm not too good at running
Me (very proud):-yeah you only ran 10min while I ran 20min! Come on!
S:-Hum, did you know? Clara WhatsherName has a line of lingerie now.
Me:- i dont know her
S:-Oh yeah, that's ok
E:-Who? Oh..hehehehehe
Me:-Not sure what is the news here, unless she designs lingerie for guys?
S:- EH? What?
So I just get back to work because some client wants my advice on something, then tells me my voice is really pleasant, 3 times....before I pass him on to somebody else.

U:-So mine is 20%. Hey S let me measure yours.
S:-How is it calculated?
U:-you take your waist size and your weight and you can calculate it (with a measuring tape in his hands)
Me:-Is this your BMI you are talking about?
U:-Yep
S:-How come you dont take into account the height?
U:-I don't know
Me:-Ahhhh so really I have the perfect BMI for a 1m90 person
N:-HAHAHAH so are you 1m90
Me:-I sure feel like it!
P:-Hey do you have some food, sweets, anything?
K:-Hey I am lifting 140kg now (wait or was it 40kg? I really dont know and didn't pay attention to this one)


I don't even transcribe here the talks about shagging and pulling someone, or the description of certain women...


At this point I leave the area to take some fresh air...Because I just imagined working with a lot of women, and seriously it depressed me a bit.Can you imagine that times 100, with added make up tidbits and gossips?

These guys are awesome! They give me just enough for entertainment!! And sometimes they speak in codes, making me work hard trying to decode their references, as they often refer to guys stuff, like cars, cartoons, french movies, porn movies, etc....

Today I ended up the day swearing like a low life....I guess all these testosterone rub off on me a bit...I wonder why all these aggressivity in me...Tomorrow let us all wear a skirt.

Some trip across East London...

Thursday evening, after abandonning the 7+ guys to abr hop on their own (one Mai Tai did me in), I stumbled back home, hoping to crash on my bed soon. Alas, that World War 2 blitz bomb prevented me from getting home. They were suspending the service towards my home at 21h30, and I waited with loads of people for more than 30minutes to cacth a train home, only to see one arrive, packed with smelly tired workers, unwilling to concede any cm2.

So we waited another minute for the next one to arrive half empty. A trip that would take 45min took me 2hours. And Friday morning wasn't easy either as the damned bomb still prevented trains to go throught heir usual routes. So we all took a long detour, but ended up to work. I was debating whether to catch the bus from the house directly but decided for the train, which was not too packed luckily, but would go as slow as a snail in a rainforest...yes, so that you can admire everybody else's junkyard along the railways of course!
Now you would think they probably evacuated a whole town to detonate that thing safely. Unless they just like to piss travellers off by changing their train schedules, closing train stations, and making us walk in the rain. And this eveing at 1835 was the worst time to travel through the London public tranportation as we were all caught back in time and held in unknown locations (between train stations).

None of the lines I usually take were working. And I had to backtrack myself twice to catch the bus home. That fantastic bus was super packed and even from the deck i could see the hordes of people trying to fit in a red motorized tin can. The silver lining was that I finally got to see Easy London by bus, and not just the motorway by black cab.

I suppose there are prettier areas in town, but passing all though those rundown 'villas', the old cinemas converted in bingo halls, loads of chicken joints, and even a housing development having a poem about hemoglobin and chlorophyl to emphasize the marriage of human and nature...except the whole building was in red bricks and there were no trees or plant in sight....adios chlorophyl! Besides,given the amount of sun in this area of the planet, only the moss growing on top of bus stops can claim to use chlorophyl.

About 40min by bus and I was finally dropped not far away from home...not sure if the blitz bomb has been safely removed, but with the amount of water dropping from the skies, we can only hope it's been drowned otherwise.

I suppose I will stay happily at home, cleaning up glasses and planting undersea trees for the future.

How to let go?

By running till I'm out of breath
After eating a box of Phish Food ice cream on sale
Or by practicing that scale till my elbows and ears hurt
And I can still phantom play the piece in the train
By getting lost into idiomatic expressions in different languages
and wrapping my head around kanji symbols
Yet...
My longing remains.

Facial hair festival in Notting Hill

I ended up sampling some gypsy music at the Notting Hill Art Club, where the Transiberian Marching Band was playing. And since they were having this revolutionary festival, we tried out some facial outfit.

Sonata in A minor (op.42)

So here is Diane Walsh playing the piece I am trying to learn these days: my favourite Schubert from now on.
So, this piece has 7 pages and i finally started learning page 3..hehehe, I am also practicing the finger jumps..hmmm and I am missing some high and low notes but hey, I can hear the sound in my head and hopefully my fingers also will remeber these notes...GAMBARIMASU YO.

Spring in Panam

It's been a while since I felt the warmth of a sping sun, and an hour south of Londonium was very much sunny as the season was well advanced. I re-disocvered Notre Dame from the outside ins; ate gyros, crepes, kaiten sushi, pomme de pain sandwich, daloyau ice cream, macarons, and lazied up in Luxembourg garden like in the old times. Even managed to get my dose of Louvre for probably another decade. It probably helped to pretend to be a tourguide for this tourist.


It was a bit nostalgic and I sometimes felt 14 again at times...how strange!

My 'secret' garden...

It is secret because noone knows what is in those 2 pots: after planting some grains on sunday, every morning I wake up excited that maybe some magic happened and I will see some new little green plants emerge from the brownish dirt! I am even tempted to do the same dance as in the anime となりのトトロ (Tonari no Totoro). Except I have to wake up at 6am these days so really, the only dance I manage to do is to not to sleep on the toilet...heheh

In any case, now that I have proved myself in the rearing of plants that don't die upon my presence, I am getting adventurous and trying on to grow things that I could eat...of course I like pretty things too, such as the pink pale tulips...


But all my efforts are always to fill my stomach...

Beethoven Sonata #5 Spring

1 st Movement, by Szeryng/Rubinstein

Homesick

So i got hooked on a japanese tv series and rediscovered music pieces heard decades ago:the power of an orchestra,the versality of piano, the poignant violin...am homesick of the past.

'I fought the war, but the war won'

After a girls' night out, where I stuffed myself with well deserved lobster, given I swam like a Sharks survivor for 20min, it was time to test the fuzzy feeling left by the dessert wine Vin Santo. I must stay I got the buzz, with red cheeks and easy smiles, and a warm feeling of time wisely spent.

Unfortunately my route was troubled by public transport and its users. I was peacefully digesting my giant load of food, when some stereotypical kid in hoodie, baggy pants and arrogant way of walking got in the coach, stood next to me near the door, finished rolling up his herbs, lit it up, took a puff and exhale the disgusting smell of hash...well, in my head I was cursing his unconceived descendants (ie wishing for his low fertility), while wishing for his puff to choke him. So in my sweetest voice, I said:
-'excuse me, could you please turn that off. I am allergic'
I was almost hoping he was blind to not see the big red non smoking sign all over the carriage. Or maybe he didn't understand English? But then this punk asnwered while trying to shamefully extinguish his poison.
-'you should have stopped me before I lit it up'

Maybe I should have just taken the whole think and extinguished it with my foot. So I told him he knows he shouldn't be smoking in the tube anyway. To that he mumbled something about being 'strict'...really, I could have mumbled something about 'respect'. But I was most amazed noone else actually reacted when he lit up that cigarette!

At the next stop, some people got off at the station so some seats became vacant, so I put some distance between myself and the 'may he die painfully' kid. And sure enough, he lit up his thing again! And once more, noone among the 30 people in the carriage said nothing. So I got up and left the damn carriage!

Maybe I am making a big deal of this, but it is not a good sign when noone other than my 1m50 person to stand up to a kid disturbing your well being in a public transportation.

I well remember that proverb we put in school for a cultural event:'it takes a village to raise a kid'..well this community I am living in is not raising the kids very well...

Snowy Clapham Common

Snow!

And i slept over and have to walk under snow

If I had £2 000 000....

Yesterday I was sleepily pressing the button on the watermachine to get some hot tea at work before settling on my desk, when a colleague from the English team happily said: 'I bet if you were given £2 000 000 you'll be more awake and happier'....

Of course it took me about 9 years to realize he was speaking to me. Then another 8hours to register what he said. I already had my sleepy smile on my face, then andwered:'well, I don't know what I'll do with that money'. Then another 27 seconds later, with my hot camomille tea in hand, my head cleared up a bit, as he was telling me about investment, and I had to listen and try to understand what he was saying...so eventually I was forced into a conversation where my main participation was to say:'I'd have too much to do I'll be even more stressed, and let's face it, the more I have the greedier I tend to become and so I won't probably enjoy it more than now.'

After that 5 minutes conversation, I was fully awake, and worked hard until 17:30....it's only coming back home after gym, reviewing for my exam once last time (exam which I really hope I passed because I am not confident in my answers anymore)...well, after all that, when I was slipping into unconscienceness of my dear sleep, my last thought was that indeed, I wouldn't know what to do first if I get £2 000 000.

Now I think it's a bit odd, because I am sure a lot of people will have an aswer right away, of their plans, their first purchases, or investments...Is it because I don't know the value of the amount? Or because I have no plans, no objectives? Or maybe I don't aim for that amount of money so that I haven't spent it already in my mind?

It's not the lact of projects that actually stops me. It is the fact that the possession of that amount would make me happier for a long time that I challenge. Upon reception, of course I will be overjoyed to see the chance to live some projects. But it doesn't mean there won't be any sacrifices. And those still would hurt....

Because I've always beena big spender, my only chance of being happy in the morning would be to wake up very late, and getting a very sunny and warm weather...and being with people I love...how sentimental...now I guess £2 000 000 could make that happen...maybe...

In the meantime, I have to loose weight and continue running like a sloppy hippopotamus on a treadmill...may my knees not buckle and my back keep me vertical...

A rainy day in London Town...

Sometimes I am determined to brave a horrible weather to see tall and heavy boys row on a river. That was today, and I think I won't attend that boat race again unless it is very sunny and warm outside. After all they don't need the wind, they really row for like 19 minutes do to 4 miles. So, Oxford (blue team)beat Cambridge (white team) this time. It just reminds me I need to visit Cambridge someday.


In any case, there were quite a lot of people south of the river, and I could see the forest of umbrellas from across the Thames. There was also a boat filled with spectators cozily snapping pictures at the poor 18 crew members getting ready to row from the top of their lungs for 4 miles in 8C and horizontal rain...



That area is quite nice actually, around Putney bridge. There is a lovely muddy park with a path along the Thames, and blooming magnolia trees, a cute church and a cute house in Bishop's park. I will have to walk along the river westbound this summer to explore that area.

We all learned English with the same book

Gad Elmaleh, who kept me company during my sickness...

'Dactylo Rock'

Mathieu Boogaerts & Mathieu Chedid

Oh bear, panda bear

Seriously coming nose to paper to this was a bit disturbing. But why not? Anything from the far east seem fashionable these days, and millions of people will be already buying into panda trinkets with the olympics...I just hope they don't disturb the beast too much..it's a bear after all, not so sociable an animal...

I am having a white Easter

And now it's snowing...
And I am missing the 'colour of magic' on telly tonight.

Ping pong....FX

Impossible! I ran out of shampoo!r

And so I had to find an excuse to get out of the house, while my body clearly didn't want to leave the bed it was sweating into for the past 4 days. A short trip to the doctor, where I had to beg for an appointment*, and a short trip to the drugstore, to find the prescribed drugs, and a shampoo..and am back with my forest of tissues and chicken soup. I am not sure which is worse: the hammering of the construction outside the windows, or the persistent piercing pains at my temples. But then when I am about to choose, the coughing starts over and nothing else matter that the few bursts of air that manages to get in me...

Maybe I should have called 999 Saturday. But then again, how many in a life threatening situation remember to identify it as life threatening? I was just sweating a cold off....now I am suffering one...

*To you, oh unaware of how medical care works: When one is ill, one needs to phone his General Practitioner and get an appointment. If you haven't registered to a GP, then you cannot get an appointment but have to show up at some hospital...
In my case, my GP is in West London, I don't know where the nearest hospital, and I called on monday to get an appointment on wednsday....Then I called again this morning to beg, and finally got one at 10...LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL

Weekend bite size pleasures

Fantasy muffins

Stroll in Camden Market to see what's left from the fire

Blown away, or how NOT to start a good Monday

Unlike the movie that could be coming to mind, I was not in passionate romantic epoch piece or story. I was merely trying to wake up when getting off the train when the wind attacked me trough my very bones and started to fight against my poor umbrella. Halfway to work my umbrella gave up and flew away, leaving me with a pathetic metallic rod to protect me from the gale and wind along the few yards leading to work. Also my lunch box broke and I was left holding my 2 tupperwares of chinese curry and courgette like a famished vampire protecting its last drops of blood...Then in the lobby at work, I was told the elevators weren't working...so in my mindless state, I had to climb the stairs to the 7th floor.

I would like to think I was being punished but I am not sure for what. On the other hand I didn't go to the gym this evening.

My only consolation for tonight is to be able to post my letters, which are 1 week overdue, and to buy some lamb to cook that rendang one more time...to prove myself I didn't do it by mistake.

'I am not a target market'

I am re-reading Generation X from D. Coupland and it always makes me laugh and sad at the same time. Good read always. Otherwise I realize I am becoming a 'devil' wearing 'prada': my plastic glasses have that little logo I am afraid, and I've just accepted an invitation that another one of my colleguae, more senior than me, could have accepted as well. being a second choice though, I did not hesitate. Only upon knowing who the 3rd choice was I realized I migght have hurt his sensibilities. but I doubt he really wanted to attend this thing anyway...for me it's free lunch....:) I will try to be cute and well behaved but really I am there for the free food...nothing has changed much.
Still, there is this conscience whispering for 'justice' or order of things...ah well...I have to look after myself as well when that time comes. I will have to be super helpful in the future to make sure I don't run on my own but with everyone else. I am very gregarious when I think about it. I like to stay in the safety of the pack. I do my own things though,

I am preparing for a busy week as Zab is coming over to try out my new flat and to bring me some wine, and hopefully some Kambly...What to do?
Thursday we're going to see Wicked, the musical that tells the story of the witches of Oz
Friday, well hopefully if my body can handle it afte rmy early morning shift, we will hang out at the Big Chill or Guanabara, depending on the mood.
Saturday, some sightseeing could be nice, chilling and strolling, maybe a boat ride to Kew?
Sunday, I should rest, or hang out at Spitalfieds Market, weather permitting...especially if I need to replenish my fridge.

But today, I will need my beauty sleep.

The house has been warmed.

I can still remember my first kiss and my first gin and tonic. I also remeber my first heart ache, even if I am not too sure over which boy. There are litle things that I am not sure why I remeber, like the kid ritual to bury leaves to make the rain stop falling. Or the noise and bustle of a ballet class when I was barely 6 year old. I am sure I will remember my first housewarming decades from now though because I actually had to cook for 9 other people and they ate most of the food and even said it was good...It gives me a bit of confidence in my well renowned experimental bad-looking cooking. So let me write down the recipes of these dishes I served my first ever guests:
-Lamb Rendang: cook cubes of lamb with a bit of oil and basil leaves, adding boiling water and simmer for million years while I am cleaning frenetically the flat until midnight. The next evening, while the guests are trickling in, add the Indofood spice mix for Rendang beef and let simmer again for another 7000hours until you serve it to the guests. You can also add some coconut milk to make it cremy but I thought there was enough fat with all the oil...it turned out ver nice and sooo tender I was suprised myself (so I'll make sure to start simmering the day before to make somthing tender)
-Ikan Bumbu Bali: That's fish with some balinese spices. Again, fry the fish filets in the morning with a bit of olive oil and lemon juice, leave it in the fridge until coming back from work. Heat up some oil with the IndoFood Bumbu Bali spice mix, then add in the fish...I was supposed to add in some more fresh tomatoes and onions, but since the guys already ate up the lamb, and I was pretty drunk by 9pm, and I couldn't find any room to chop the veggies, I figured they're just going to eat fish...serve it up nice and warm
-Wonton: dump the wontons in boiling water. My pot was so small it ended up being a big block of wonton that we had to cut with a knife and serve with soy sauce and sweet and chili thai sauce.

My coworker (Little Chef) who knows how to cook brough 4 tons of rice (I had to buy a big pot to be able to heat it up), another potful of curried lentils, and made chicken tikka upon arrival at my house....It was really yummy and I am seriously glad he pitched in for the rice and all the chicken and lentils...Instead of waiting for monday to eat his lunch, I can now eat some of his cooking during this weekend..hehehhe

It was a night of missing pots and ustensils of all sorts to use (foil wrap, pots big enough to cook for 10 people, working space, soft drinks, ice cream, snacks). I had to ask another coworker (still can't find a name for him) to buy appetizer, beer, juice, and a pot to reheat the rice. I also had to go downstairs at the local supermarket buy ice cream, and another pot to reheat the lentils.

I ended up with 2 additional huge pots, 3L of vanilla ice cream, lemon tart, chocolate cheesecake, 1 Riesling, 1 red wine, a bottle of champagne we forgot in the fridge, 2 beers, 2 bricks of juice, 1 coke, millions of containers with leftovers so that I won't cook for next week, and a good feeling that I fed 10 people, including myself.

This morning I ate wonton for breakfast and froze the rest for next week. I also will have enough fruits for the week: melon, prunes, grapes, aple, banana.

It was a well behaved party, the place is intact and all tidied up by 2am, and I just need to figure out how to make the dishwasher work once I buy some soap....

At the end of the tunnel

Do you see my door at the end of this corridor?

I love this phone

So thanks to a colleague i get a basic slow internet connection by connecting my 3G enabled mobile to my laptop. I cant uplnad much but i can check my mails!

Sunset

Yup. From my messy new flat.

View from the flat

This morning i realize my windows face west. Nice sunset from the balcony to look forward to!

London 0, Fog 2

It's only the second foggy day but I kind of like the sight of it. When I wake up in the morning, everything beyond the 3m mark is masked by a thick white fluffy cotton fog. It's refreshing to walk into, and the light does not hurt my puffy eyes. When I get to work, the view from the 7th floor is magnificent: nothing but white cotton through the glass window and I get this feeling I am in space, up in the clouds...very uplifting.

Even better this morning when the shuttle driver decides to change route and cut through some 'residential' area with litle parks. I missed my camera and was too sleepy and dreamy to take out my phone and snap away the shapes of tortured naked trees in the fog. That other route was rubbish too as it wasn't quite a shortcut with all the constructions along the road, and the traffic jams along the way. I felt completely lost until we ended up at the roundabout next to our building.


I hope the fog continues, it completely fits my mood right now...I am quite poor after paying my deposit and rent for the new flat. So to relax a bit, I paied £21 more to have my hair washed, my head massaged and my hair cut. Now all i need to do is finish whatever is in the fridge and freezer and hope I won't have leftovers to throw away or carry over East London....

All I need now is a facelift because as my colleagues say, 'I look like shit recently'...charming

Mai, Mitoko, and me

Sometimes falling asleep while watching movies in the early mornings makes me so nostalgic. I do love following stories, whether in books, movies, ballet, stage, music...So today apart from moving dust around and a lame attempt to clear the room, the agenda was to take catnaps and watch all the movies I can watch. They are meant to inspire and give me courage.

Something funny: a night out on Brick lane was suggested at work..after I move away from the area..so ironic. But I guess I will enjoy coming back.
Something to plan: maybe this year I will give a Valentine's day present, if I remember in time to find and get it. This would be a first.
Something to remember: to remember
Something kinda gross yet lifesaving: inactivated forms of a virus must be grown inside chicken eggs. DNA vaccines, on the other hand, can be grown in bacteria,

'Ave Caesar, ave moi'

really even with the subtitles it would have been quite difficult to understand the jokes and references to French films and songs. But it was a good laugh, with loads of sports stars and actors.

'Chasing Cars' - Snow Patrol

We'll do it all
Everything
On our own

We don't need
Anything
Or anyone

If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

I don't quite know
How to say
How I feel

Those three words
Are said too much
They're not enough

If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

Forget what we're told
Before we get too old
Show me a garden that's bursting into life



Let's waste time
Chasing cars
Around our heads

I need your grace
To remind me
To find my own

If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

Forget what we're told
Before we get too old
Show me a garden that's bursting into life

All that I am
All that I ever was
Is here in your perfect eyes, they're all I can see

I don't know where
Confused about how as well
Just know that these things will never change for us at all

If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?
------------------------------------------------------
Something that always brings tears to my eyes as I miss you

Bye bye 'twenies'

I love cartoons, I watch anime
I lick the Nutella pot clean with a finger, a spoon or a knife
I still bite my nails
I can't cook following a written recipe
I still cry loads when I like someone and I don't see why they don't like me
I am still not comfortable talking about sex in public
I can't drink more than 2 glasses of alcohol without being trashed
I still think I can do ballet with a 40kg buttock
I like fairy tales and read them from time to time.
My hair is till black and I haven't found a white hair yet but lots of split ends :(
I like sweet and candy, and carambar and malabar
I still hate waking up and going to work even if sometimes it's fun during the day
I like lego, a lot
And collage

Funny I got older supposedly!

Bears and bulls, rising prices etc...

Of course I now take some curious pleasure in reading some business section of some free newspapers. Having sat through a 2 hour introduction to financial data (which I requested), I should understand a bit more what those people in suit and ties are wasting lines and paper about. Well, it is still like chinese, but as exciting as learning a new language: as long as you know a little bit here and there, it is fun to recognize and understand words and concepts here and there. It is like grasping the 50% of a sentence, and the hilarious aprt is to try guessing what the real sentence was.

So sometimes I can make up a story and some reasoning or prediction, that eventually does not turn out to be real at all. The fact that it is usually in the morning, on my way to work does help a bit.

However, I first hand noticed the price rise i London: Yesterday on my way home I bought a kebab in r oll from the take away curry shop 'Sweet and Spicy' down Brick lane. I think it cost me £1.35. It was really nice, so this evening I got tempted again and ordered the same thing. He charged me £1.40 ! I was dressed exactly like yesterday so, with even the same hairdo.

So, either:
1- he really doesn't want me to eat that anymore, or eat there anymore, or
2- there is no fixed price and I should have bargained, or
3- this country has areally high inflation, or
4- he made a mistake, or
5- this time the spicy sauce was extra (and i got it for free ysterday), or
6- I should order the same thing tomorrow to confirm any theory above

Because really, if this price increase continues, I am better of going to the 'Lahore Express' on Bethnal Green where I can get a full wrap with veggies and meat and sauce and a smile, for like £1.50 instead of a spicy kebab in a pancake....

Moving pictures

Some may wonder why I watch anime so much. I don't watch the Powerpuff girls movies where everything is roundish and cute-ish. So far the ones I have been hooked on are very disturbing ones like 'Death note', sentimental and a bit girly (such as 'Nana'), or just adventurer type anime like 'Mushishi' or 'Claymore'.

I was blown away by all of them.

'Nana' dwelled so much into women feelings and friendships, as well as loneliness, it was quite refreshing to follow a storyline where things are not always happening according to a fairytale. 'Mushishi' on the other hand consists of tales that can only be possible because of the rich beliefs in spirits in the nippon culture. A bit like how a sorcerer or a traditional medicine man travelling around the country would encounter many strange cases that reveals some behavioural oddities (example the flower which blooms everyevening and makes you forget the previous day for the rest of your life once you inhale its scent: some people are better off forgetting and seeing a new day).
One of my favourites is 'Claymore', which follows the adventures of a girl named Claire who is 1/4 monster and 3/4 human (the other Claymores are traditionally half human half monster), and who exists to kill monsters that threaten the humans...a bit twisted really. However the Claymores get their strength from their monster side, but are trained to control the monster in them. I just found it very true as most humans are monsters and it's really our humanity that makes us 'civilized' or not eat each other's guts. This week though this anime came to mind when they granted 2 labs to start animal-human hybrid cells research. I am afraid it won't be long before a lab get broken and hybrid cells that are supposed to be destroyed after research get stolen and developed into chimeras: would it be or feel human or would it be animal? How would we judge? Not content with procreation, we human really are obsessed with creation.

'Death Note' is about a psychological chase and mystery between a bored brilliant student who found a strange diary and the police led by a genius teenager. The diary allows its owner to kill anyone by visualizing the face of its victim and writing his name in the diary. Armed with the death note, he becomes drunken with ambition to create a world free of criminals, and to become the god of that world. He is challenged by the other genius who also remains anonymous. Think 'The departed' where each one tries to unmask and kill the other. This anime actually springs from a novel or a manga apparently, and there are also movies made of it. However, the characters are not as cute and polished as in the manga or anime.

Happy new Year!

Ah yes the long awaited new year...now that it is here, nothing much has changed though, so it is up to me (and all of you there, yes you! you!) to make change happen.

I am sticking to my new resolutions (okay, the ones I had last year too). I have managed to stop eating between meals, and I don't jump on snacks or croissant or sugar fix like a famished beggar anymore. Instead I painfully peel an orange and feed myself with its sticky juice.

I also discovered the joys and pains of wii. Santa Claus managed to reward our office with a wii for Christmas, so in addition to the table football, we now can play tennis, bowling, golf and boxing in the comfort of our 7th floor kitchen. I was KO by my teammate yesterday and believe me, my arms are still sore from that 5 minute match!

I will keep on swiming, and eating healthy, and hopefully will stop eating my nails along the way....add in to that the fact that i am looking for a flat for mid-february!

St Sylvestre

Oh so cold

Greetings

A straight line to the holidays

London is pretty festive these days. There are lights everywhere, company Christmas parties, sales, and so many lights we forget about the daylight. Strolling on Oxford Street becomes unbearable, because half of London showed up to shop, and also because there are so many temptations in the shops. I am supposed to save some money!


Even bank was illuminated with pink spots as a party was starting inside the Royal Exchange building.

A stroll on Portobello Road revealed a very empty market, where only a few tourists dared to stroll because each side of the road was littered with shops that you can see anywhere else in the capital. My little jamaican snack shop dissapeared and was replaced by a tapas restaurant. GNN GNNN GNNN

And then it hit me. The ones staying in London for the holidays are the very rich who revels in their £400/week apartment, the very poor who cannot afford a holiday like me, and the tourists. Even my usually lively area has become quiet, only disturbed by drunken beggars and their dogs.

So this year, I will attempt to attend the midnight mass, because I rise when I am surrounded by belivers, singing in a beautiful cathedral, echoing all the heartfelt songs on the cold hard marble. It sends shivers to my spine and reminds me that there is some good in this life worth a little exploration.

whats the integral of 1/cabin?

...beach hut (log cabin plus c).


Do not forget you maths, you still use it everyday at the most random times!
It's finally the weekend again and am so glad. I am seriously looking at important decisions to make.
What school to start enrolling for Japanese? Where to move house to? What to do with my pension, cash it in or transfer it? Should I eat the last cookie even if I ran out of milk? What's the budget for tomorrow's flowers? What curse to put on the people downstairs who woke me up with their home improvement noises? Which show should I book for the end of year festivities?

I know now why some people have a PA or a secretary to do everything. All these decision making are absolutely time consuming. It's barely 11am and am already tired!

On the upside, I got lazy staying under my white fluffy covers while thinking about my friends. Ahh I like saturday mornings after all...let's procrastinate until sunday morning...

December blues

Yesterday morning I saw the dawn of the much anticipated end of the week. It was such an intense week as it is very busy at work. My mornings are cold out there, and this particular one was very windy. So windy in fact a mini tornado downed 2 lamp posts inches away in front of me as I walked to the station. It actually woke my sleepwalking head, and made me quite nervous. So I speedwalked the rest of the street, watching out for other lamp posts to fall noisily on the street...pheww..that was too close.

For a minute I was cheering myself up, with the 'I am alive' motto, but I still didn't manage to feel any urgency to skip and jump with my arms in the air.
Was it because I still had to go to work? (oh shoot, it's only my first week!), or was it because I was just tired? In any case, I mainly thought about my family. I have always prouded myself in being ready and not being too afraid of death, but am I being honest? I wasn't ready then. For a start, I didn't have breakfast, because I wanted to arrive early at work to clean up my act and plan my strategy for the day. And then I realize it is most difficult to be ready to say goodbye to your loved ones.

I still wished I heard the cool enthusiastic backround music and the rush of ' I'm gonna do all the crazy things on my list' kind of feelings. The adrenaline picked up at work, and I ended the day without a single minute for myself (just once to pee). I grabbed a Coke can for the bus.

Almost just another ordinary day. I still hadn't seen an Ed Norton movie where he ends up on top...why? why?why?

I think I still want to change the world, so I am not too depressed yet...It's just that people get on my nerves and in my way too often...not to mention lamp posts...grrrrr

Surfing in the meeting room

Live from London

Sumo at work

Another fun friday last week

'Cause it's the wild wild west

At work...sometimes we work too, but since we were still in training then, we took advantage of all the fun activities organized...

What I did last Autumn

Fudgemaking in Baltimore, MD:


Library of Congress and Arlington cemetery in Washington DC:


Crazy night out in Montreal:

Remembering my first week at work

Well, I was lucky enough to start the job on the week they had a team building activity scheduled. And it sat right with me as it involved food!


And this coming Monday I will finally work as such as I completed my training!

zero degree

Yes, I am straddling the Greenwich timeline..you know...Half of me is east and half of me is West...and it was a cold evening. Photo thanks to HappyFeet by the way.

Hokies 33-21 over Cavaliers

Just in case you were wondering...
Go Hokies!
Next game is the ACC championship game, December 1st.

Tech fans

Watching game vs UVA

Tears

For the fleeting memories
And the good deeds
For the ones left behind
and the face I won't see again

To wash away the sorrow
And bring the family to mind
To swallow the bitter aftertaste of life
And hold the moments at heart

"The Blowers Daughter"- Damien Rice

And so it is
Just like you said it would be
Life goes easy on me
Most of the time
And so it is
The shorter story
No love, no glory
No hero in her sky

I can't take my eyes off of you
I can't take my eyes...

And so it is
Just like you said it should be
We'll both forget the breeze
Most of the time
And so it is
The colder water
The blower's daughter
The pupil in denial

I can't take my eyes off of you
I can't take my eyes...

Did I say that I loathe you?
Did I say that I want to
Leave it all behind?

I can't take my mind off of you
I can't take my mind off you

I can't take my mind...
My mind...my mind...
'Til I find somebody new

Sunset

Yesterday, feeling great as school/work finished early, I managed to catch the sunset on a different view: at Bank station, waiting for the bus. They just cleaned this part of the building so it's spanking and shining new.

And the end of the week seems sunny so far so I am not too fussed wearing skirts while all the trousers are at the cleaner's

Neighbourhood street art

A sample of what is nearby.

I see those almost everyday and never had a time to take proper pictures. These are taken from my phone, and I will have to make some by daylight too.

525600 minutes...

Very sweet memory of singing along in Atee's room and going to Burruss hall watching the show. I even remember where I was seated and how I got there late...

This was my first outing with people from work that I don't even know or work with. I am just that popular...hehehehe

Fire!

Something is burning across the road and the dark cloud is raining carbonized stuff on us at work. Apparently though some warehouse was burning, and there are more pictures of it here.

Sluggish

On a nice day, I can stare out of the window sometimes and see the view outside, on the river. On a bad day, I get to see more clouds than necessary and I am not seated next to the window.


And I also appreciate the heights and the empty space between my feet and the ground...

At least once the past week, I laid my head on the pillow feeling so numb and haggard and deaf I was just hoping to switch off. And then to be surprised the next morning to hear the alarm clock and realize I am still alive (sigh).

I really cannot think ahead enough to next year at this point. It's really living one day at a time, trying to keep my spirits and attention up everyday (thanks to vitamin c and multivitamin pills)...I love my bed...

And why do I only get along with friends who I can only see at most twice a year????

'La barre de faire'

花火 !!!

"Remember, remember the fifth of November,
Gunpowder, treason, and plot,
I know of no reason why the gunpowder treason
Should ever be forgot.
Guy Fawkes, Guy Fawkes, 't was his intent
To blow up the King and Parliament.
Three score barrels of powder below,
Poor old England to overthrow;
By God's providence he was catch'd
With a dark lantern and burning match.
Holloa boys, holloa boys, make the bells ring.
Holloa boys, holloa boys, God save the King!"

It's the season again: bonfires and fireworks, whether for Halloween or Guy Fawkes failed explosion. From every corner and alleys leading to a small park, colorful light erupts in cheerful bangs and fizzes.

But the big one is in 2008..and to give a taste, here's from last year

How to stop biting nails

So the week started slowly, with work giving me more headaches than usual because I am getting sicker and sicker with the flu and can't seem to have any more medication at home. I was very happy to see Mr and Mrs Denmark though , who enjoyed a bit of typical rainy weather in Chinatown.

Hopefully they got home alright and managed to get some rest in their Paddington hotel last weekend.
During their visit, we managed to eat Bengladeshi (of course!), delicious burger and milkshakes at Ed's Diner at Leicester Sq, the good old sandwich at Subway (they're crazy about this), chinese food in Chinatown, and sushi in Little Tokyo (aka Brewer St).

In all that frenzy, I started biting my nails again...after it gre the whole summer..sniff. And no, putting on acrylic fake nails does not help as they are too long and I am unable to use a keyboard with them, or pick my nose, ears and scratch my eyballs. So really...please, show me the will to stoooop...

The alternative so far has been to wear gloves..but I believe I am weird enough at work without it so no need to stand out even more...

Sunday football

Obviously i was rooting for the New York Giants, but I felt I could not wear any of their shirts or caps because ...really...does it make sense for me to wear something with 'GIANTS' written on it??

Something to look forward to

I have no more trip planned this year. It's sad. I already miss my friends. And the ones I know in London are travelling abroad (or not really friendly, or autistic). Everyone I like here is away, out of London or moving away.

Fortunately work is pretty intense and lots of interesting concepts and opportunities flying about, as well as germs...but the company is offerning vaccine shots (ok, for only £12)...should I get them? Am not a big syringe fan. But again if I want to continue swimming and working with coughing and sneezing colleagues and survive the winter, maybe I should...but I don't have time to go...I have work to do....or cheese to buy ...or cake to buy....or some other food...for the team...am glad they love food, and I miss the adrenaline rush of being on the desk..because for now I am stuck doing e-learning (some of it ok, some of it are like fire prevention and safety at work..very boring). I can't wait to install my first product and then tear it apart and re-install it...something I like to do with some people's brain.

I can't wait for the year to finish..because next year:
-I will have an extra holiday (as per company policy, 1 additional day off /year, max 30 days...so after 30 years service one has 55 days off/year..LOL)
-My Maman will come to visit me...yeah (inch'Allah)
-I will get older (boooooo)
-Maybe I'll get my own apartment , no more sharing, if my bank lends me some money
-I will have vacation days to spend wisely in various trips

So seriously, for once I want time to go faster...Like I want to wake up and it's 2008.

The end of autumn

The sun sets before 6 these days already, and soon I will go home everyday seeing this when coming out of the office.

It can be worse (yes, in about a month or so).

To fight the season's gloom, I finally managed to run outside (after a self adminstered pep talk) and even dragged my flatmate out (she walks, I run). Time flew again this weekend and I didn't even have time to iron or stich up my trousers or even pamper myself to a girly mask or shop till I drop....

Instead I only got groceries (the fridge is full) and cooked for the week (the freezer is full), and cleaned my room again after buying another wardrobe for my winter clothes. The keyboard is back on the balcony, and an aloe vera and another cactus are keeping company to each other on the windows. Hopefully they'll survive winter with me.

The resolution for the week is to stop eating at work. It has been a very excessive week because each memeber of the team keeps bringing food in turns!! From croissants, pain au chocolat, english fry up breakfast, it didn't stop!! Tryly, they socialize around food, but I must stay away from it. Matter of fact I now sit at the end of the desk, isolated by my 3 screens (yes, three, don't ask me why, I am a very busy important person!NOT). I can pick my nose and make faces to myself and nobody can see me.

'A life of happiness or a life of meaning'..or else?

That's the choice given to a character in an episode of Heroes. And it explains the difference too: A life of happiness, where one does not dwell on the past and doesn't worry about the future; Or a life of meaning, whereby one is haunted by the past and spends all the present worrying sick and working for the future around him....Obviously most people want both...But is it really feasible?
At the time I watched the episode I was wondering why another alternative wasn't considered. A life where one feels happy about what he/she had lived and done; To be able to be satisfied and feel complete.
But when I think about it, the subtle difference is that the 3rd option can only be decided or assigned as such on one's deathbed, whereas the 1st two can be a daily conscious decision.

Do I eat the tiramisu now and get fat or not eat it and be healthy? The decision is now. But whatever decision I take now will ensure my level of satisfaction if I die in the next 3seconds, 3 months or 3 centuries. Yes, I am pretty much trying to live a life of happiness most times....take it now, worry later. It feels simple enough.

Alas, it's all different when it involves other people. Other people I love, other people I fancy or care about, and other people I don't like. Still, I usually do whatever I want because why wait?? I might die in a second.

Nine years later

But who's counting? A few things changed, but the jeans still don't fit on the first try, the memories always look better than reality.

It's like meeting for the first time packed with the familiarity of past lives! And I am feeling great stitching together my two lives as things come rushing back to mind.

It's amazing how life can be so sweet!