I Heart Robot?

Well, what a shock, after watching Zettai Kareshi, I stumble on this news:
http://news.yahoo.com/s/afp/20080615/ts_afp/lifestylenetherlandstechnologylovesexrobots_080615055138


Scary stuff...makes you think a bit about why and how we feel sometimes.

Iznogoud or Izitgoud?

Alas, I don't have that marsupilami comics around, but for sure I was torn between fear of poisononing and will to please again this morning. Like any present I try to offer, it is always a torture before getting the approval of the recipient. Imagine me baking a 'pudding' from 3 days old bread, milk, egggs and banana, and bringing it to work for my comrades...it was still warm when it got to the office, and I was in torture thinking it is disgusting and noone will eat it (since I didn't even have a chance to taste it).
This is a torture I am enduring at each gift or offering, because I usually choose it on impulse then regret or fear for its validity or value until the actual offering: is this too much? is this enough? would it be useful? will it end in the trash? is this suitable? etc...Of course there is the joy of being able to offer something, but it is only completelly fulfilled when the recipient(s) actually enjoys it...

Why the worry? I am not sure. Maybe because I just want everything to be perfect, although i never found it easy to choose the time to give the present. So I tend to slip it or throw it at them, casually, pretending I din't care,that it is not a big deal. But strangely enough, it is quite a big deal for me...vanity? or I care so much about what people think of me after all?

Ah well, they finished the cake. I will remember to collect and use old leftover baguettes from work next time.

This is a man's world

Here is a typical day at work. Obviously we all try to get to our desk on time before the hordes of clients hurriedly call us on our headset(some have wireless ones and can still sound professional in the toilets). And this is why I can never be a good fiction writer because I can nver come up with these gems:

N:-Hey I got my package!
S:-Yeah? let's see, how many did you get?
N:-Hmm, two. Chocolate and banana flavour (or was it vanilla and banana?)
U:-Wow, I can't believe you spent £100= for those. In my case I just reduce the amount I eat.
Me (unaware of things):-What? What did you get?
N:-Meal replacement powder
Me:-You mean like Slim F*ast? How much? Is that the same as powder juice like K? I hope you got more than 2 flavours because you're going to not like those flavours after 3 days! (imagine 5kg of each flavour)
N:-Well, this is supposed to be a meal on its own but I will still eat dinner and maybe fruits...
S:-But you must exercise as well, running especially. how long do you run?
N:-Well I'm not too good at running
Me (very proud):-yeah you only ran 10min while I ran 20min! Come on!
S:-Hum, did you know? Clara WhatsherName has a line of lingerie now.
Me:- i dont know her
S:-Oh yeah, that's ok
E:-Who? Oh..hehehehehe
Me:-Not sure what is the news here, unless she designs lingerie for guys?
S:- EH? What?
So I just get back to work because some client wants my advice on something, then tells me my voice is really pleasant, 3 times....before I pass him on to somebody else.

U:-So mine is 20%. Hey S let me measure yours.
S:-How is it calculated?
U:-you take your waist size and your weight and you can calculate it (with a measuring tape in his hands)
Me:-Is this your BMI you are talking about?
U:-Yep
S:-How come you dont take into account the height?
U:-I don't know
Me:-Ahhhh so really I have the perfect BMI for a 1m90 person
N:-HAHAHAH so are you 1m90
Me:-I sure feel like it!
P:-Hey do you have some food, sweets, anything?
K:-Hey I am lifting 140kg now (wait or was it 40kg? I really dont know and didn't pay attention to this one)


I don't even transcribe here the talks about shagging and pulling someone, or the description of certain women...


At this point I leave the area to take some fresh air...Because I just imagined working with a lot of women, and seriously it depressed me a bit.Can you imagine that times 100, with added make up tidbits and gossips?

These guys are awesome! They give me just enough for entertainment!! And sometimes they speak in codes, making me work hard trying to decode their references, as they often refer to guys stuff, like cars, cartoons, french movies, porn movies, etc....

Today I ended up the day swearing like a low life....I guess all these testosterone rub off on me a bit...I wonder why all these aggressivity in me...Tomorrow let us all wear a skirt.

Some trip across East London...

Thursday evening, after abandonning the 7+ guys to abr hop on their own (one Mai Tai did me in), I stumbled back home, hoping to crash on my bed soon. Alas, that World War 2 blitz bomb prevented me from getting home. They were suspending the service towards my home at 21h30, and I waited with loads of people for more than 30minutes to cacth a train home, only to see one arrive, packed with smelly tired workers, unwilling to concede any cm2.

So we waited another minute for the next one to arrive half empty. A trip that would take 45min took me 2hours. And Friday morning wasn't easy either as the damned bomb still prevented trains to go throught heir usual routes. So we all took a long detour, but ended up to work. I was debating whether to catch the bus from the house directly but decided for the train, which was not too packed luckily, but would go as slow as a snail in a rainforest...yes, so that you can admire everybody else's junkyard along the railways of course!
Now you would think they probably evacuated a whole town to detonate that thing safely. Unless they just like to piss travellers off by changing their train schedules, closing train stations, and making us walk in the rain. And this eveing at 1835 was the worst time to travel through the London public tranportation as we were all caught back in time and held in unknown locations (between train stations).

None of the lines I usually take were working. And I had to backtrack myself twice to catch the bus home. That fantastic bus was super packed and even from the deck i could see the hordes of people trying to fit in a red motorized tin can. The silver lining was that I finally got to see Easy London by bus, and not just the motorway by black cab.

I suppose there are prettier areas in town, but passing all though those rundown 'villas', the old cinemas converted in bingo halls, loads of chicken joints, and even a housing development having a poem about hemoglobin and chlorophyl to emphasize the marriage of human and nature...except the whole building was in red bricks and there were no trees or plant in sight....adios chlorophyl! Besides,given the amount of sun in this area of the planet, only the moss growing on top of bus stops can claim to use chlorophyl.

About 40min by bus and I was finally dropped not far away from home...not sure if the blitz bomb has been safely removed, but with the amount of water dropping from the skies, we can only hope it's been drowned otherwise.

I suppose I will stay happily at home, cleaning up glasses and planting undersea trees for the future.

How to let go?

By running till I'm out of breath
After eating a box of Phish Food ice cream on sale
Or by practicing that scale till my elbows and ears hurt
And I can still phantom play the piece in the train
By getting lost into idiomatic expressions in different languages
and wrapping my head around kanji symbols
Yet...
My longing remains.

Facial hair festival in Notting Hill

I ended up sampling some gypsy music at the Notting Hill Art Club, where the Transiberian Marching Band was playing. And since they were having this revolutionary festival, we tried out some facial outfit.

Sonata in A minor (op.42)

So here is Diane Walsh playing the piece I am trying to learn these days: my favourite Schubert from now on.
So, this piece has 7 pages and i finally started learning page 3..hehehe, I am also practicing the finger jumps..hmmm and I am missing some high and low notes but hey, I can hear the sound in my head and hopefully my fingers also will remeber these notes...GAMBARIMASU YO.

Spring in Panam

It's been a while since I felt the warmth of a sping sun, and an hour south of Londonium was very much sunny as the season was well advanced. I re-disocvered Notre Dame from the outside ins; ate gyros, crepes, kaiten sushi, pomme de pain sandwich, daloyau ice cream, macarons, and lazied up in Luxembourg garden like in the old times. Even managed to get my dose of Louvre for probably another decade. It probably helped to pretend to be a tourguide for this tourist.


It was a bit nostalgic and I sometimes felt 14 again at times...how strange!

My 'secret' garden...

It is secret because noone knows what is in those 2 pots: after planting some grains on sunday, every morning I wake up excited that maybe some magic happened and I will see some new little green plants emerge from the brownish dirt! I am even tempted to do the same dance as in the anime となりのトトロ (Tonari no Totoro). Except I have to wake up at 6am these days so really, the only dance I manage to do is to not to sleep on the toilet...heheh

In any case, now that I have proved myself in the rearing of plants that don't die upon my presence, I am getting adventurous and trying on to grow things that I could eat...of course I like pretty things too, such as the pink pale tulips...


But all my efforts are always to fill my stomach...

Beethoven Sonata #5 Spring

1 st Movement, by Szeryng/Rubinstein

Homesick

So i got hooked on a japanese tv series and rediscovered music pieces heard decades ago:the power of an orchestra,the versality of piano, the poignant violin...am homesick of the past.

'I fought the war, but the war won'

After a girls' night out, where I stuffed myself with well deserved lobster, given I swam like a Sharks survivor for 20min, it was time to test the fuzzy feeling left by the dessert wine Vin Santo. I must stay I got the buzz, with red cheeks and easy smiles, and a warm feeling of time wisely spent.

Unfortunately my route was troubled by public transport and its users. I was peacefully digesting my giant load of food, when some stereotypical kid in hoodie, baggy pants and arrogant way of walking got in the coach, stood next to me near the door, finished rolling up his herbs, lit it up, took a puff and exhale the disgusting smell of hash...well, in my head I was cursing his unconceived descendants (ie wishing for his low fertility), while wishing for his puff to choke him. So in my sweetest voice, I said:
-'excuse me, could you please turn that off. I am allergic'
I was almost hoping he was blind to not see the big red non smoking sign all over the carriage. Or maybe he didn't understand English? But then this punk asnwered while trying to shamefully extinguish his poison.
-'you should have stopped me before I lit it up'

Maybe I should have just taken the whole think and extinguished it with my foot. So I told him he knows he shouldn't be smoking in the tube anyway. To that he mumbled something about being 'strict'...really, I could have mumbled something about 'respect'. But I was most amazed noone else actually reacted when he lit up that cigarette!

At the next stop, some people got off at the station so some seats became vacant, so I put some distance between myself and the 'may he die painfully' kid. And sure enough, he lit up his thing again! And once more, noone among the 30 people in the carriage said nothing. So I got up and left the damn carriage!

Maybe I am making a big deal of this, but it is not a good sign when noone other than my 1m50 person to stand up to a kid disturbing your well being in a public transportation.

I well remember that proverb we put in school for a cultural event:'it takes a village to raise a kid'..well this community I am living in is not raising the kids very well...

Snowy Clapham Common

Snow!

And i slept over and have to walk under snow

If I had £2 000 000....

Yesterday I was sleepily pressing the button on the watermachine to get some hot tea at work before settling on my desk, when a colleague from the English team happily said: 'I bet if you were given £2 000 000 you'll be more awake and happier'....

Of course it took me about 9 years to realize he was speaking to me. Then another 8hours to register what he said. I already had my sleepy smile on my face, then andwered:'well, I don't know what I'll do with that money'. Then another 27 seconds later, with my hot camomille tea in hand, my head cleared up a bit, as he was telling me about investment, and I had to listen and try to understand what he was saying...so eventually I was forced into a conversation where my main participation was to say:'I'd have too much to do I'll be even more stressed, and let's face it, the more I have the greedier I tend to become and so I won't probably enjoy it more than now.'

After that 5 minutes conversation, I was fully awake, and worked hard until 17:30....it's only coming back home after gym, reviewing for my exam once last time (exam which I really hope I passed because I am not confident in my answers anymore)...well, after all that, when I was slipping into unconscienceness of my dear sleep, my last thought was that indeed, I wouldn't know what to do first if I get £2 000 000.

Now I think it's a bit odd, because I am sure a lot of people will have an aswer right away, of their plans, their first purchases, or investments...Is it because I don't know the value of the amount? Or because I have no plans, no objectives? Or maybe I don't aim for that amount of money so that I haven't spent it already in my mind?

It's not the lact of projects that actually stops me. It is the fact that the possession of that amount would make me happier for a long time that I challenge. Upon reception, of course I will be overjoyed to see the chance to live some projects. But it doesn't mean there won't be any sacrifices. And those still would hurt....

Because I've always beena big spender, my only chance of being happy in the morning would be to wake up very late, and getting a very sunny and warm weather...and being with people I love...how sentimental...now I guess £2 000 000 could make that happen...maybe...

In the meantime, I have to loose weight and continue running like a sloppy hippopotamus on a treadmill...may my knees not buckle and my back keep me vertical...

A rainy day in London Town...

Sometimes I am determined to brave a horrible weather to see tall and heavy boys row on a river. That was today, and I think I won't attend that boat race again unless it is very sunny and warm outside. After all they don't need the wind, they really row for like 19 minutes do to 4 miles. So, Oxford (blue team)beat Cambridge (white team) this time. It just reminds me I need to visit Cambridge someday.


In any case, there were quite a lot of people south of the river, and I could see the forest of umbrellas from across the Thames. There was also a boat filled with spectators cozily snapping pictures at the poor 18 crew members getting ready to row from the top of their lungs for 4 miles in 8C and horizontal rain...



That area is quite nice actually, around Putney bridge. There is a lovely muddy park with a path along the Thames, and blooming magnolia trees, a cute church and a cute house in Bishop's park. I will have to walk along the river westbound this summer to explore that area.

We all learned English with the same book

Gad Elmaleh, who kept me company during my sickness...

'Dactylo Rock'

Mathieu Boogaerts & Mathieu Chedid

Oh bear, panda bear

Seriously coming nose to paper to this was a bit disturbing. But why not? Anything from the far east seem fashionable these days, and millions of people will be already buying into panda trinkets with the olympics...I just hope they don't disturb the beast too much..it's a bear after all, not so sociable an animal...

I am having a white Easter

And now it's snowing...
And I am missing the 'colour of magic' on telly tonight.