On friday morning, the live feed on tv showing a massive wave of destroyed habitat trampling over fields, people and everything it encountered put me in a strange state. My first reaction was to check by any mean the welfare of anyone I know in the area affected. The second reaction, most surprising, was to fly there myself and help...
Some people in Madagascar probably live in poorer conditions but somehow I felt more sympathy for a faraway land. Maybe it is because I only had good and precious memories there.
I have thought hard about the second impulse and deduced it could be different things:
-the fact that I long to feel needed again and that my current job does not provide me that satisfaction anymore. In short it is pure selfishness.
-I always want to go to Japan
-maybe I am having my midlife crisis where I feel I would risk my life and do things impulsively
A disturbing nightmare visited me that night where a savage human preyed on another one, eating at his convulsed and foaming face while I watch horrified and unable to do anything but silently scream.
That sight still haunts me during my waking hiurs and I am not sure what inspired that vision.
Over the weeken, I found myself praying for the survivors, that they find courage and strength to go through the difficult life ahead of them: no food, no water, no shelter, no job, etc...and I was unable to pray for my friend when she had her surgery...
They would call it irrational.
In any case I feel I miss the comforting presence of my dear papa in this situation as he experienced disasters like this more often than he wished for.
No comments:
Post a Comment