Sunday, May 20, 2007

'Why do I keep hitting myself with a hammer?

'Because it feels so good when I stop' (Grey's anatomy)
I got hooked on another medical series.

Speaking of pain, I think I might have solved my own riddle. Why do I tend to fall for guys who are unreliable, unresponsible, penniless, stupid and worthless? And why do I keep longing for such badass players?

Apart from the fact that maybe I am stupid too, the hidden reason could be that I long for the apparent freedom, carefree and spontaneity of them. No career angst, no responsibility, just pure fun and laughs, frozen in time, in that instant. It may only last a few minutes, but it is so sheer blisss and lightness. And isn't that all we look for all our lives? Yes of course, but we also enjoy the search and the suprises that come with it.

I remember something I read once, about living like there is no tomorrow and planning like we are going to live forever (or something with the same flavour). So even when I am sad and hurt like a broken glass, I try hard to plan to be happier, just in case I don't die right there.

I wonder if panda's actually ever think about these, lacking in bamboos and all that.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Panda's probably don't think about that at all. They have no problem of sharing a man, and having sex in public ... or in a tree ... whatever ...

Floating said...

All pandas want for their whole life is to take a color photo for themselves as they are forever black and white... They don't think about bamboo... but actually bamboo is much useful than a color photo.

just being happy about what you are having now and you are happy already

Anonymous said...

Pandas don't have sex. That is why they are dying out.

And also all the other bears beat them up. Hence the black eyes.

And yes - the sky is black in my world....

Anonymous said...

Pandas don't have sex ... pfffft ... (btw, poor Angie !!! LOL LOL) ... don't want to be a panda then ... what is left :-) ?

P A N D A ----P----@ said...

I guess Pandas are very picky and not so much obsessed as some others...:)