Sunday, May 17, 2009
Fruits
Rainy day in Kyoto
Friday, May 15, 2009
Returning from miyajima island
Thursday, May 14, 2009
Superview from Umeda skybuilding
Edit: not to be confused with Ueda, the silly professor whoearned martial arts by distance learning. Lol.
-presents are always wrapped. If you mention it to a shopkeeper, he'll do it. And better than my wraping and their normal wrap is beautiful
-you must change shoes when entering the toilet. There is a pair there just for that. It is a bit of an exercse to leave your shoes outside the toilet, then wear the ones inside the toilet.
-I can now eat fish on its bones with chopsticks. It may tage hours but the dish is the more delicious
-I learned to bow when exiting a shop. The trick is not to forget to urn around completely and face the shop.
-knowing the basics of the language is very useful as many original restaurant or shops out of the beaten path have loads to offer
-I can eat 3 times again, full set of homecooked meals.
Finally, the view is from a landmark in the north part of Osaka. At sunset, it must be beautiful, but I was not paired up so went back home...sniff. But the homecooked dinner with the whole K. Family was ready when I got home and we chatted till 11pm so all is good.
-presents are always wrapped. If you mention it to a shopkeeper, he'll do it. And better than my wraping and their normal wrap is beautiful
-you must change shoes when entering the toilet. There is a pair there just for that. It is a bit of an exercse to leave your shoes outside the toilet, then wear the ones inside the toilet.
-I can now eat fish on its bones with chopsticks. It may tage hours but the dish is the more delicious
-I learned to bow when exiting a shop. The trick is not to forget to urn around completely and face the shop.
-knowing the basics of the language is very useful as many original restaurant or shops out of the beaten path have loads to offer
-I can eat 3 times again, full set of homecooked meals.
Finally, the view is from a landmark in the north part of Osaka. At sunset, it must be beautiful, but I was not paired up so went back home...sniff. But the homecooked dinner with the whole K. Family was ready when I got home and we chatted till 11pm so all is good.
Dotonburi:shopping and eating in Osaka
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
Vendor machine
Monday, May 11, 2009
Osaka, more like discovering Sakai city
Meeting the K. Family was fun. I could understand them and we had fun doing groceries at the supermarket, with all the food I've never seen before. Later on we had temakizushi at home, literally hand sushi, where everyone just self served with stuff to put in they seaweeds and made their own roll or cones. Some had beer, I had plum wine. Yum!
Today, we went to see a famous burial mount of an emperor, the shape of a keyhole, surrounded by 2 water barrier: koofun. It's about 500m long and as wide. After that we went tempozan, the lowest mountain of Japan:4,53m. Lol. Pictures later. And finally after seeing many trucks on the road to minato, we went into Osaka fo the Osaka-jou, the old castle. The weather was still hot, maybe 25C at 4pm. Back at home I had a demo of calligraphy and my name written, and it was beautiful. In the evening we walked to a nearby yakitori restaurant, got drunk and ate loads of meat on sticks...I have no idea what tomorrow has for me, so I'll sleep tired, sweaty and happy I can be understood so far from my reality...
Today, we went to see a famous burial mount of an emperor, the shape of a keyhole, surrounded by 2 water barrier: koofun. It's about 500m long and as wide. After that we went tempozan, the lowest mountain of Japan:4,53m. Lol. Pictures later. And finally after seeing many trucks on the road to minato, we went into Osaka fo the Osaka-jou, the old castle. The weather was still hot, maybe 25C at 4pm. Back at home I had a demo of calligraphy and my name written, and it was beautiful. In the evening we walked to a nearby yakitori restaurant, got drunk and ate loads of meat on sticks...I have no idea what tomorrow has for me, so I'll sleep tired, sweaty and happy I can be understood so far from my reality...
Saturday, May 09, 2009
Asakusa in the morning, Roppongi to Shimbashi in the afternoon
A few words about today:
-An early morning due to jetlag. I have never been that awake at 4:00am
-McDonalds breakfast: imagine a sausage and egg sandwich with maple syrup stuffed pancackes as bread...YUM!
-A nice morning walk in Asakusa, viewing Sensou-ji temple and the backstreets around Kaminoarimon.
-A long walk to Tokyo station, and a very expensive umbrella to comfort and protect me from the...sun...yup yup
。。。。
-An early morning due to jetlag. I have never been that awake at 4:00am
-McDonalds breakfast: imagine a sausage and egg sandwich with maple syrup stuffed pancackes as bread...YUM!
-A nice morning walk in Asakusa, viewing Sensou-ji temple and the backstreets around Kaminoarimon.
-A long walk to Tokyo station, and a very expensive umbrella to comfort and protect me from the...sun...yup yup
。。。。
First landing
Last night arrival left an impression of a hot and humid weather on my skin. I was sweating profusely in the train but managed my 2 connections at Tokyo station and Ueno station without getting lost. It was around 8pm so plenty of suited salarymen around. It was easier to spot the casual dressed workers and tourists. Also met my first drunken salaryman at Asakusa station, but the stationmaster kindly helped him through the gates and toward his train. So far everyone i approached with my broken japanese was very kind. I still need to find a SIM card as I couldn't find one in Narita.
Wednesday, May 06, 2009
Craziness before takeoff
The day is finally here in 30min, the day I am going east, east east!!! It's still amazing me how about a year ago, in a mentoring and coaching class, I volunteered as a cobaye, to be coached. And this lady actually talked me through my vague plan of one day going to Japan. At that time I was just playing around, trying not to be too serious, just to play my role as a demonstrator...And here I am, after devouring Minna no Nihongo volume 1 and taking with me volume 2 just in case.
And in the last 2 days, it's stress after stress: decisions at work (not taken yet), laundry to do and dry, room to clean, maps and hotels information to print, passport to copy, suitcase to pack (only 20kg allowance!!!), weight to loose (ah well, had a burger and fries tonight before getting some healthy japanese food soon), phones to unlock, money to exchange, face to tidy up (yes, pimples that I havent' seen in months are appearing just to make me presentable to the beautiful new country that will host me), emails to send (planning to visit the Tokyo office)...
I am crazy. Or I just love the thrill ebfore a trip. At this time tomorrow, I'll hopefully be sleeping in the plane as my day at work will start at 7 (ok, 7:15 because the shuttle service starts at 7), and I will try to tame the beating of my hearts to slow down a bit, for fear of tearing down the office out of excitement.
And in the last 2 days, it's stress after stress: decisions at work (not taken yet), laundry to do and dry, room to clean, maps and hotels information to print, passport to copy, suitcase to pack (only 20kg allowance!!!), weight to loose (ah well, had a burger and fries tonight before getting some healthy japanese food soon), phones to unlock, money to exchange, face to tidy up (yes, pimples that I havent' seen in months are appearing just to make me presentable to the beautiful new country that will host me), emails to send (planning to visit the Tokyo office)...
I am crazy. Or I just love the thrill ebfore a trip. At this time tomorrow, I'll hopefully be sleeping in the plane as my day at work will start at 7 (ok, 7:15 because the shuttle service starts at 7), and I will try to tame the beating of my hearts to slow down a bit, for fear of tearing down the office out of excitement.
Sunday, April 26, 2009
Spring in music with LPO
That's the London Philharmonic Orchestra, resident of Royal Festival Hall on Southbank. I just happened to walk by on Saturday afternoon and found out they were playing. The program? You can here some sample on their website.
I was familiar with the hall, and I got to sit on the side, just behind the first violins. So I could see the orchestra and conductor from within 5-10 meters. I was very surprised when the conductor arrived on stage because I forgot I met him before: during my audition with the London Philharmonic Choir!!!!
From the first note uttered by the violins, I was pierced by the beautiful blending sounds. I don't know if it was because I was very close to the stage or because the pieces they were playing were very touching, but it made my heart slow down and my body hair rise. I was in tears and so happy.
I almost laughed when they played the nuptial march from the Mendelssohn suite. I will never be able to enjoy that piece of music during any wedding because I now have heard it with a full orchestra and its sound is so much more than a celebration of a wedding!!!
I have become a fan of that orchestra and will attend more of their performances as they ar enot too expensive compared to the Royal Symphonic Orchestra of the Royal Opera House.
I was familiar with the hall, and I got to sit on the side, just behind the first violins. So I could see the orchestra and conductor from within 5-10 meters. I was very surprised when the conductor arrived on stage because I forgot I met him before: during my audition with the London Philharmonic Choir!!!!
From the first note uttered by the violins, I was pierced by the beautiful blending sounds. I don't know if it was because I was very close to the stage or because the pieces they were playing were very touching, but it made my heart slow down and my body hair rise. I was in tears and so happy.
I almost laughed when they played the nuptial march from the Mendelssohn suite. I will never be able to enjoy that piece of music during any wedding because I now have heard it with a full orchestra and its sound is so much more than a celebration of a wedding!!!
I have become a fan of that orchestra and will attend more of their performances as they ar enot too expensive compared to the Royal Symphonic Orchestra of the Royal Opera House.
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
3 days under the sun
I have packed away the wool coat, and taken out the tissues. Pollen and dust are seen reflecting the light from the sun that has blessed us for about 3-4 days now. The temperature is consistently reaching the double digits, from noon anyway. The mornings are comfortable even though the evenings are still chilly. Maybe we are having a pleasant spring.
But I am faced with brain tiring decision to make. On one hand, a tiresome but secure job to do, in a different country where opportunities for entertainment or access to evening courses are limited. On the other hand, the risk of unemployment but maybe also the chance to change job.
I have 2 weeks to make a choice, before flying off to the other face of the earth and forget myself in unknown land. So for now, in between looking for hotels, I am looking for jobs. It should be the other way around, but I am too stressed to be doing it full time, and I am more interested in enjoying my holidays. I haven't open a textbook in weeks, and I know I am loosing some vocabulary already, but I will cram before the departure..
For now, I am trying my best to tamper my guts feeling and wait for the deal breaker to show up, one way or another so that I can make a decision whether to sign the damn contract or not...
But I am faced with brain tiring decision to make. On one hand, a tiresome but secure job to do, in a different country where opportunities for entertainment or access to evening courses are limited. On the other hand, the risk of unemployment but maybe also the chance to change job.
I have 2 weeks to make a choice, before flying off to the other face of the earth and forget myself in unknown land. So for now, in between looking for hotels, I am looking for jobs. It should be the other way around, but I am too stressed to be doing it full time, and I am more interested in enjoying my holidays. I haven't open a textbook in weeks, and I know I am loosing some vocabulary already, but I will cram before the departure..
For now, I am trying my best to tamper my guts feeling and wait for the deal breaker to show up, one way or another so that I can make a decision whether to sign the damn contract or not...
Monday, April 13, 2009
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
Yes No Maybe
Sometimes I just can't write anything, like today...
Maybe because there is so much I want to put in words but they are not addressed to anyone in particular. Or even worse, I just cannot share them with anyone else but myself, and that usually wlows down the process of forming words.
So instead I started reading again. Books with stories, words that bring up vivid images and atmospheres. Many people, my colleagues included, call that wasting time and argue that as opposed to watching a movie, it is a waste of energy to concentrate and read stories...I suppose that is the only reading I do since I tragically fail to read any newspapers.
<> <-----unshared thought
For now I am working on defining my new quest.
Maybe because there is so much I want to put in words but they are not addressed to anyone in particular. Or even worse, I just cannot share them with anyone else but myself, and that usually wlows down the process of forming words.
So instead I started reading again. Books with stories, words that bring up vivid images and atmospheres. Many people, my colleagues included, call that wasting time and argue that as opposed to watching a movie, it is a waste of energy to concentrate and read stories...I suppose that is the only reading I do since I tragically fail to read any newspapers.
<> <-----unshared thought
For now I am working on defining my new quest.
Sunday, March 15, 2009
電話 by レミオロメン
'Denwa' by Remioromen
These hot days just keep continuing. Are you doing o.k.? I'm worried. You know that I'll be steady. I feel awkward just talking to you over the receiver, but we both feel the same way. It's natural. It didn't go as well as I thought. So far, so far, we're separated from eachother. There are even times we spend all night talking over the phone. Even though my heart is frail, out of the deep darkness, some light manages to shine. You and I laugh and cry together. With you living in some other city, I can't bring us together. But I'm here. The sky is dank, with a hurricane ripping through in the distance. Both at once? What horrendous weather. I feel even lonelier. The night makes the floors, doors, and walls seem impossibly vast. The window rattles from the harsh wind. Let's stay connected by the receiver and keep talking until we're too tired to go on. With you living in some other city, I want you to understand. We're not alone. Even the weather report can't capture it, how we've been separated. Still it looks like these hot days are going to continue. The clouds begin to part the rain is letting up, but you and I are still wet from the laughter and tears we share. With you living in some other city, I can't bring us together. But I'm here.
3月9日 by レミオロメン
In the middle of this drifting season
I suddenly feel the length of the days
In the midst of these quickly-passing days
You and I dream away
With my feelings on the March wind
The cherry blossom buds continue on into spring
The overflowing drops of light
One by one warm the morning
Beside you, I’m a little embarrassed
After a huge yawn
I’m standing at the door to a new world
What I’ve realized is that I’m not alone
If I close my eyes
You’re behind my eyelids
How strong has that made me?
I hope I’m the same for you
The dusty whirlwind
Tangled up the laundry, but
The white moon in the morning sky
Was so beautiful, I couldn’t look away
There are things that don’t go the way I planned
But if I look up to the sky, even they seem small
The blue sky is cold and clear
The fluffy clouds float by quietly
If I can share with you the joy
Of waiting for the flowers to bloom, I’ll be happy
From now on, I want you to be quietly smiling beside me
Saturday, March 14, 2009
Spring at the window
With 2 duvet, a warm bottle, socks, sweatshirt over my pyjamas, spring hasn't really made an effect on my freezing body yet, even if it is showing it's frail figure among the howling northern winds and budding clouds. The window is not windproof, nor soundproof! Across the street, luxurious one bedroom apartments with all glass walls shine their warmth and comfort through teasing blinds...
Really, I can't wait for the summer to warm and appease my frustration.
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Stretching my mind
From last saturday my mind has tried to outreach to all potential contacts that could get me those bloody concert tickets. As a results, this week's work has been bothersome, tedious and plain annoying. The fact that the boiler is down and showering with 3 pots of hot water every morning is not helping the bleak mood. All is not lost though as I still manage to get to work for the sake of my colleagues (thinking I am indispensable) and not so much about my clients. but 70% of the time my mind is turned east, to this trip in japan. So this is what it feels like to have a dream and reach out to it? Strange
Saturday, February 21, 2009
How to fit my stuff in 25m2
When I wake up this is what I am seeing:
And this is where I spend most of my time:
The drawer and wardrobe is still messed up so it won't be worth showing. It's so cozy the only available empty space I have is that runner on the floor where I sprawl around when making a mess and avoiding the bed.
And this is where I spend most of my time:
The drawer and wardrobe is still messed up so it won't be worth showing. It's so cozy the only available empty space I have is that runner on the floor where I sprawl around when making a mess and avoiding the bed.
Saturday, February 14, 2009
Getting lost in shoreditch
We were walking around digesting delicious vietnamese lunch...in search of dessert. Which was tiramisu. And i finished cleaning my new room
Friday, February 13, 2009
Friday 13th
Today should be a good day, since it's payday!!! YEAH!
A little update of the series I am watching these days or watched recently:
Maou
Love Shuffle
Voice
Uta no oniisan
Let's hope I'll keep having the time to watch them this season.
PS: FOr some, this is a bloody day...
A little update of the series I am watching these days or watched recently:
Maou
Love Shuffle
Voice
Uta no oniisan
Let's hope I'll keep having the time to watch them this season.
PS: FOr some, this is a bloody day...
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
Rollercoaster
Today has been a bit eventful. I almost got an international assignment as a team leader in Geneva, if the 14 other applicants in Geneva did not exist. Nevertheless, I showed up on time this morning at 9:00, to see an email from the very pregnant team leader in Geneva asking me to book a Videoconferencing room for 10:00 for my interview.
Rewind.....
February 2nd we receive an email about some assignment in geneva, with an assessment scheduled on February 5th. On february 5th, I inquire about the details of the roles to my boss, who knows nothing more than I do. So he suggested I register my interest. So I agreed and told him 'yeah, well, to be interested, we also need the details right?'. So that was Thursday evening. Then the next day, Friday at 5PM, HR calls me and asks me to send a CV and motivation letter to very pregnant woman L. that is about 30min before I finish. Fortunately Mrs. L. asks me to send those on Monday instead as she is in a hurry to go on weekend. Which I sent first thing yesterday...
And this morning, I had to book a bloody videoconferencing room. Fortunately one boss was around so I just begged for a room and she made the booking. Then I had to find the room and make the damn thing work..so my boss came down with me and we tried to find the damn room in Geneva...he managed to connect to it, sat me down in the executive chair and left me panting for air...And so started the most unprepared job interview of my career so far:
-'what is your plan to improve performance and reach this year's objective?'
ah, a plan? hmmm...I surely said something plausible but since it was improvised I cannot remeber what i said
-'how do you go about working with product A and B?
Wait, as far as I know, my boss doesn't know anything about the products I am playing with so...'I'll obviously learn as much as I can on my own, using the resources available'..well that is the most obvious answer I gave...although I doubt it is feasible given the timeline
-'Are you confident to do sogiven that we are looking for someone to start at the end of february at the latest?'
welllll, see??This is why I asked for the bloody details!!! Nowhere in the announcement did it say that it would be so short notice (I am not a journalist so I am not used to being sent to the end of the world in the following minute). But hey, my suitcases are already done since I am moving house, might as well stay packed for Geneva.
Anyway, 1h later of almost jokingly answering all the questions to those 3 Swiss based bosses (2 pregnant ladies and a smily dude), I was told to book another room for this evening to announce their decision.
I had all afternoon to find out the deal about relocation packages and the international assignment policies. By the time I found and made a quick scan of it, it was time for the second videoconference......This time I was incapable of making video contact.
So I sat in the executive chair, looked at myself in the big flat screen in front of me and heard their decisions over the phone: 'I was brilliant, please apply again in June, etc...They'd prefer a plug n play person, who already knows all the stuff.' To be honest, unless the 14 other applicants from Geneva were total crap, it is cheaper for them to have someone local. BUT....I had my face out there and now they know who I am....
Little me is very proud, because I was almost in my pyjamas, in my head especially. Now I just have to apply to those other positions and get to know more people. Thi is like wearing sandwich boards in the streets with my name on it.
Last but not least, I am relieved I am not moving to Geneva for 12 months next week!!
Rewind.....
February 2nd we receive an email about some assignment in geneva, with an assessment scheduled on February 5th. On february 5th, I inquire about the details of the roles to my boss, who knows nothing more than I do. So he suggested I register my interest. So I agreed and told him 'yeah, well, to be interested, we also need the details right?'. So that was Thursday evening. Then the next day, Friday at 5PM, HR calls me and asks me to send a CV and motivation letter to very pregnant woman L. that is about 30min before I finish. Fortunately Mrs. L. asks me to send those on Monday instead as she is in a hurry to go on weekend. Which I sent first thing yesterday...
And this morning, I had to book a bloody videoconferencing room. Fortunately one boss was around so I just begged for a room and she made the booking. Then I had to find the room and make the damn thing work..so my boss came down with me and we tried to find the damn room in Geneva...he managed to connect to it, sat me down in the executive chair and left me panting for air...And so started the most unprepared job interview of my career so far:
-'what is your plan to improve performance and reach this year's objective?'
ah, a plan? hmmm...I surely said something plausible but since it was improvised I cannot remeber what i said
-'how do you go about working with product A and B?
Wait, as far as I know, my boss doesn't know anything about the products I am playing with so...'I'll obviously learn as much as I can on my own, using the resources available'..well that is the most obvious answer I gave...although I doubt it is feasible given the timeline
-'Are you confident to do sogiven that we are looking for someone to start at the end of february at the latest?'
welllll, see??This is why I asked for the bloody details!!! Nowhere in the announcement did it say that it would be so short notice (I am not a journalist so I am not used to being sent to the end of the world in the following minute). But hey, my suitcases are already done since I am moving house, might as well stay packed for Geneva.
Anyway, 1h later of almost jokingly answering all the questions to those 3 Swiss based bosses (2 pregnant ladies and a smily dude), I was told to book another room for this evening to announce their decision.
I had all afternoon to find out the deal about relocation packages and the international assignment policies. By the time I found and made a quick scan of it, it was time for the second videoconference......This time I was incapable of making video contact.
So I sat in the executive chair, looked at myself in the big flat screen in front of me and heard their decisions over the phone: 'I was brilliant, please apply again in June, etc...They'd prefer a plug n play person, who already knows all the stuff.' To be honest, unless the 14 other applicants from Geneva were total crap, it is cheaper for them to have someone local. BUT....I had my face out there and now they know who I am....
Little me is very proud, because I was almost in my pyjamas, in my head especially. Now I just have to apply to those other positions and get to know more people. Thi is like wearing sandwich boards in the streets with my name on it.
Last but not least, I am relieved I am not moving to Geneva for 12 months next week!!
Sunday, February 08, 2009
Monday, February 02, 2009
Snowed in
15cm snow fell overnight and most train didnt work so i couldnt get to work. Ironically as well today is national sick day, ie most people would call in sick.
Friday, January 30, 2009
Old and beautiful
For half a day she tried on the life of a pampered woman : spending that half a day soaking in a hot bath till she wrinkled up, getting ready to walk in the cold to the hairdresser, enjoying a head massage and a new haircut (by a 'director' please! not just a stylist), then healthy dinner with sushi.
All in all though nothing else was done: no studying, no worrying..just magazine reading...kind of letting vacuum take hold of her brain.
Tomorrow, she'll be back as normal, filling up her head with kanji, information about her next trip, and worries about her future 'I'...
Sunday, January 25, 2009
Saturday, January 17, 2009
Thursday, January 15, 2009
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
MIdnight shuffle (Kondo Masahiko)
Rather than trying to live strongly
In order to truly become strong
On the edge of the rooftop
I let my wounded feathers tremble
I look up at the cool night sky
I drown in the thrill of frauds
I run into the intense knife blade
What is reality?
Where is the truth?
The blue sky seems further away the more I worry
A devilish smile like an angel
It is overwhelming this town
It seems like it could be broken, it seems it could be lost
But it will definitely go out and find
A true heart
If under the weight of the dream you carry
Your arms are becoming a little tired
It will be alright
Because I will support you
Don’t falter, just believe in that dream
A devilish voice like an angel
I can hear it in my chest
I haven’t sinned yet I am suffering
That heart is painfully
Continuing to call me…
What is reality?
Where is the truth?
The blue sky seems further away the more I worry
A devilish smile like an angel
It is overwhelming this town
A devilish voice like an angel
I can hear it in my chest
I haven’t sinned yet I am suffering
That heart is painfully
Continuing to call me…
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
The meaning of one's life and hell
I am supposed ot review for my exam which is on Thursday 10am, but instead of reading the 500+ pages required, I watched this addictive series called Maou. For those who want to take a break from Pokemon island (evil laugh) or to watch a less bloddy version of Saw, this is quite a thriller.
What impressed me most were the character's take on vengeance, hell, and atonement. The emotions are pretty raw and poignant in the series, and each character is somewhat complex. It is a series in which it is pretty difficult to hate even the 'meanest' character.
Finally, it made me feel like hell is only a threat if one understands what it feels while alive: to loose one's loved ones, not to be believed in, to be rejected by society, for example. And that vengeance can take up your whole life, which can loose its meaning once vengeance is achieved.
What impressed me most were the character's take on vengeance, hell, and atonement. The emotions are pretty raw and poignant in the series, and each character is somewhat complex. It is a series in which it is pretty difficult to hate even the 'meanest' character.
Finally, it made me feel like hell is only a threat if one understands what it feels while alive: to loose one's loved ones, not to be believed in, to be rejected by society, for example. And that vengeance can take up your whole life, which can loose its meaning once vengeance is achieved.
Tokyo, here I come
After many long months of debating and searching for a decent ticket for Japan, I finally decided on using my £250 voucher from AF (thanks striking pilots!), and booked my economy, non changeable ticket to the far east.
My month of May should be quite interesting indeed. I even have the possibility to participate in a homestay program for a week, and experience what it is to be ina Japanese family. Part of the attraction is to eat homecooking food! And maybe to learn some as well.
The only scary and appalling part? I only have 20kg checked luggage allowed!!! Hopefully it will be a warm spring season, though I'll miss the cherry blossom viewing (unless I go north to Hokkaido). But I guess I won't be carrying to heavy souvenirs on my way back.
Counting the days (and counting the calories not to eat, as I don't wanna be the fattest person there)...asian people are so thin, even my arm would give them a heart attack. It will be a full culture shock for me, but I do not want to shock them either by being foreign, dar skinned, AND fat...grrrrr..at least I'd liek to fit in my nice clothes...from 3 years ago. resolution? no...necessity.
My month of May should be quite interesting indeed. I even have the possibility to participate in a homestay program for a week, and experience what it is to be ina Japanese family. Part of the attraction is to eat homecooking food! And maybe to learn some as well.
The only scary and appalling part? I only have 20kg checked luggage allowed!!! Hopefully it will be a warm spring season, though I'll miss the cherry blossom viewing (unless I go north to Hokkaido). But I guess I won't be carrying to heavy souvenirs on my way back.
Counting the days (and counting the calories not to eat, as I don't wanna be the fattest person there)...asian people are so thin, even my arm would give them a heart attack. It will be a full culture shock for me, but I do not want to shock them either by being foreign, dar skinned, AND fat...grrrrr..at least I'd liek to fit in my nice clothes...from 3 years ago. resolution? no...necessity.
Sunday, January 04, 2009
Babble, babble, babel...?
So how many of my friends have kids now? And how many of them are already trillingual by birth? Just imagine, in 20 years, with everyone moving and expatriating all over the place, most kids will be trillingual...maybe the percentage is already close to 50% in some areas?
I remember something about most Europeans being billingual nowadays: local language and the native one, or the local language and English.
I wonder, will the left brain take over the right brain then? Or will it grow bigger? Mind you, there are already so many right handed people already, it shouldn't change much..but I wonder still..would you become left handed to relieve your left brain???
And so while looking for lateralization of brain function, I stumbled on NLP, which is used in managerial training, and which seems to be some bullshit disguised as a formula for success...but! Everyone believes in it and get NLP certified....interesting...
I remember something about most Europeans being billingual nowadays: local language and the native one, or the local language and English.
I wonder, will the left brain take over the right brain then? Or will it grow bigger? Mind you, there are already so many right handed people already, it shouldn't change much..but I wonder still..would you become left handed to relieve your left brain???
And so while looking for lateralization of brain function, I stumbled on NLP, which is used in managerial training, and which seems to be some bullshit disguised as a formula for success...but! Everyone believes in it and get NLP certified....interesting...
Thursday, January 01, 2009
In with the new year
I finally saw the fireworks on the Thames....from my bedroom window! As the chimes rang on Big Ben on the BBC, the horizon lit up with a kaleidoskope of lights, silently spilling upward. There must be thousands of people huddled underneath those lights, freezing blue and cheering the new born year, trying hard to believe in hope and new starts.
As nine replaces eight, a second later than usual, a certain bitterness stays: an after taste of ways of doing things better or wasted opportunities? Or is this just the feeling of time passing by? Why are the uneasy times better remembered than the happy times?
Happy times there were: a smile here and there, warming the gloomy mood. Laughs and cheers during family and friends reunions. A sense of small achievements upon a pay rise.
No matter how poignant the hard times are though, the short lived happiness that comes before is what I am looking forward to living again.
As nine replaces eight, a second later than usual, a certain bitterness stays: an after taste of ways of doing things better or wasted opportunities? Or is this just the feeling of time passing by? Why are the uneasy times better remembered than the happy times?
Happy times there were: a smile here and there, warming the gloomy mood. Laughs and cheers during family and friends reunions. A sense of small achievements upon a pay rise.
No matter how poignant the hard times are though, the short lived happiness that comes before is what I am looking forward to living again.
Saturday, December 27, 2008
Do you have enough socks?
Winter is gnawing at your bones and taking your breath away in a fit of coughs? Have you eaten so much your bellybutton has popped out of its socket? Or are the numbers on your credit cards so unreadable from overusing it that you can't buy anything online anymore?
The holidays period brings its shares of denial attitude: I can buy as many pair of lively colored socks, I can eat all the chocolate I got for Christmas, I can run. But the truth is, I am broke, indigestion is lurking behind that piece of chocolate, and my throat and cough hasn#t dissapeared since 23rd November.
What is worth looking forward to?
-Definetely not the new year resolutions. They will only last about 3 weeks.
-A promotion at work? that is as uncertain as my weight next year
-A new flat or room? I have about 3 weeks of rummaging through the ads online to find a cheap decent one.
-My trip to Japan in May? Only if I decide to buy the plane ticket soon, after I realize there won't be any international assignment during that period.
For now, I am in pure denial and enjoying good company in my friend Zab, who I initiated in the lifewasting task of watching Japanese JDrama (mwahahahahaha). Sharing a passion is always very satisfying...
The holidays period brings its shares of denial attitude: I can buy as many pair of lively colored socks, I can eat all the chocolate I got for Christmas, I can run. But the truth is, I am broke, indigestion is lurking behind that piece of chocolate, and my throat and cough hasn#t dissapeared since 23rd November.
What is worth looking forward to?
-Definetely not the new year resolutions. They will only last about 3 weeks.
-A promotion at work? that is as uncertain as my weight next year
-A new flat or room? I have about 3 weeks of rummaging through the ads online to find a cheap decent one.
-My trip to Japan in May? Only if I decide to buy the plane ticket soon, after I realize there won't be any international assignment during that period.
For now, I am in pure denial and enjoying good company in my friend Zab, who I initiated in the lifewasting task of watching Japanese JDrama (mwahahahahaha). Sharing a passion is always very satisfying...
Thursday, December 25, 2008
Monday, December 15, 2008
Saturday, December 06, 2008
Coup de coeur: Ikimono gakari (いきものがかり)
Koisuru Otome
つのる思いを打ち明けた
大きくうなづいてくれた
初めて握る左手は
あたしよりもふるえていた
恥ずかしがり屋のあなたは
いつもやたらと早足で
スキがあればじゃれつこうと
たくらむあたし悩ませた
「運命の人よ」「白馬の王子様よ」
あなたはまた照れて 聞き流すけど
カンジンなことは ちゃんと伝えて欲しいんだ
どうしようもないくらいに 好きだから
ゆっくりと ゆっくりと あたしを抱きしめて
微笑む あなたの 鼓動はリズム
好きだよ 大好きだよ いつまでもいっしょ
恋する あなたには あたしだけなの
いつしかあなたの横顔
のぞくことが好きになって
気付いて赤らむあなたに
キスをねだると怒られた
ほんとうはたまに ギュッと褒めて欲しいんだ
あたしまたはしゃいで 舞い上がるけど
コイスルことが 素直にわかってくる
くやしくなるくらいに 好きだから
ゆっくりと ゆっくりと この手を導いて
あたしと あなたの 素敵なメロディ
好きだよ 大好きだよ どこまでもいっしょ
恋する あたしには あなただけなの
ゆっくりと ゆっくりと 両手を突き上げて
愛しい あなたに 届くよメロディ
好きだよ 大好きだよ 何度でも言うよ
あなたに そうあなたに コイしてるの
ゆっくりと… 届くよメロディー
好きだよ 大好きだよ いつまでもいっしょ
恋する あなたには あたしだけなの
あたしだけなの
==============
I told you about my growing love
And you gave me a big nod
When I held your left hand for the first time
You were trembling more than me
You're so shy
You always run too fast
It worried me, because I was plotting
"If we're in love, let's fool around"
"My soul mate" "My prince on the white horse"
Embarrassed, you pay no attention
I want you to tell me what matters to you
I love you so much I can't help it
You slowly, slowly hold me
As you smile, your heartbeat is my rhythm
I love you, I love you so much, we'll be together forever
I'm the only one for you, my love
At some point, I've come to look
Looking at your profile
When I noticed that you were blushing
And begged you for a kiss, you got mad at me
To be honest, sometimes I want you to give me a big compliment
I'm having fun, floating again
But I know without a doubt that I love you
I love you so much it's embarrassing
Slowly, slowly, it guides our hands
Our wonderful melody
I love you, I love you so much, we'll be together forever
You're the only one for me, my love
Slowly, slowly, hold up your hands
The melody will reach you, my love
I love you, I love you so much, I'll say it again and again
I love you, yeah, you
Slowly...the melody will reach you
I love you, I love you so much, we'll be together forever
I'm the only one for you, my love
I'm the only one
Kaeritaku Nattayo
心の穴を埋めたいから 優しいフリして笑った
出会いと別れがせわしく 僕の肩を駆けていくよ
ダメな自分が悔しいほど わかってしまうから損だ
強くはなりきれないから ただ目をつぶって耐えてた
ほら 見えてくるよ
帰りたくなったよ 君が待つ街へ
大きく手を振ってくれたら 何度でも振り返すから
帰りたくなったよ 君が待つ家に
聞いて欲しい話があるよ 笑ってくれたら嬉しいな
たいせつなことは数えるほど あるわけじゃないんだ きっと
くじけてしまう日もあるけど 泣き出すことなんて もうない
ほら 見えてくるよ
伝えたくなったよ 僕が見る明日を
大丈夫だよってそう言うから 何度でも繰り返すから
伝えたくなったよ 変わらない夢を
聞いて欲しい話があるよ うなずいてくれたら嬉しいな
帰りたくなったよ 君が待つ街へ
かけがえのないその手に今 もう一度伝えたいから
帰りたくなったよ 君が待つ家に
聞いて欲しい話があるよ 笑ってくれたら嬉しいな
========================
I wanted to fill the hole in my heart so I pretended to be nice and smiled
First meetings and final farewells restlessly pile up on my shoulder
I realize regrettably how hopeless I am and that’s my loss
I can’t be stronger so I closed my eyes and put up with it
Look, I can see it now
I want to go home now, back to the city where you wait for me
Give me a big wave hello and I’ll return it just as big
I want to go home now, back to the house where you wait for me
I’ve got a story I want you to hear and I’ll be glad if it makes you smile
I’m sure I can’t count everything that’s precious to me
There might be days when I stumble but I won’t cry anymore
Look, I can see it now
I want to tell you now, all about the tomorrow I see
I’m doing just fine, I’ll keep telling you as long as it takes
I want to tell you now, all about my steadfast dream
I’ve got a story I want you to hear and I’ll be glad if you nod your approval
I want to go home now, back to the city where you wait for me
I’ll grab that irreplaceable hand now and tell you once more
I want to go home now, back to the house where you wait for me
I’ve got a story I want you to hear and I’ll be glad if it makes you smile
つのる思いを打ち明けた
大きくうなづいてくれた
初めて握る左手は
あたしよりもふるえていた
恥ずかしがり屋のあなたは
いつもやたらと早足で
スキがあればじゃれつこうと
たくらむあたし悩ませた
「運命の人よ」「白馬の王子様よ」
あなたはまた照れて 聞き流すけど
カンジンなことは ちゃんと伝えて欲しいんだ
どうしようもないくらいに 好きだから
ゆっくりと ゆっくりと あたしを抱きしめて
微笑む あなたの 鼓動はリズム
好きだよ 大好きだよ いつまでもいっしょ
恋する あなたには あたしだけなの
いつしかあなたの横顔
のぞくことが好きになって
気付いて赤らむあなたに
キスをねだると怒られた
ほんとうはたまに ギュッと褒めて欲しいんだ
あたしまたはしゃいで 舞い上がるけど
コイスルことが 素直にわかってくる
くやしくなるくらいに 好きだから
ゆっくりと ゆっくりと この手を導いて
あたしと あなたの 素敵なメロディ
好きだよ 大好きだよ どこまでもいっしょ
恋する あたしには あなただけなの
ゆっくりと ゆっくりと 両手を突き上げて
愛しい あなたに 届くよメロディ
好きだよ 大好きだよ 何度でも言うよ
あなたに そうあなたに コイしてるの
ゆっくりと… 届くよメロディー
好きだよ 大好きだよ いつまでもいっしょ
恋する あなたには あたしだけなの
あたしだけなの
==============
I told you about my growing love
And you gave me a big nod
When I held your left hand for the first time
You were trembling more than me
You're so shy
You always run too fast
It worried me, because I was plotting
"If we're in love, let's fool around"
"My soul mate" "My prince on the white horse"
Embarrassed, you pay no attention
I want you to tell me what matters to you
I love you so much I can't help it
You slowly, slowly hold me
As you smile, your heartbeat is my rhythm
I love you, I love you so much, we'll be together forever
I'm the only one for you, my love
At some point, I've come to look
Looking at your profile
When I noticed that you were blushing
And begged you for a kiss, you got mad at me
To be honest, sometimes I want you to give me a big compliment
I'm having fun, floating again
But I know without a doubt that I love you
I love you so much it's embarrassing
Slowly, slowly, it guides our hands
Our wonderful melody
I love you, I love you so much, we'll be together forever
You're the only one for me, my love
Slowly, slowly, hold up your hands
The melody will reach you, my love
I love you, I love you so much, I'll say it again and again
I love you, yeah, you
Slowly...the melody will reach you
I love you, I love you so much, we'll be together forever
I'm the only one for you, my love
I'm the only one
Kaeritaku Nattayo
心の穴を埋めたいから 優しいフリして笑った
出会いと別れがせわしく 僕の肩を駆けていくよ
ダメな自分が悔しいほど わかってしまうから損だ
強くはなりきれないから ただ目をつぶって耐えてた
ほら 見えてくるよ
帰りたくなったよ 君が待つ街へ
大きく手を振ってくれたら 何度でも振り返すから
帰りたくなったよ 君が待つ家に
聞いて欲しい話があるよ 笑ってくれたら嬉しいな
たいせつなことは数えるほど あるわけじゃないんだ きっと
くじけてしまう日もあるけど 泣き出すことなんて もうない
ほら 見えてくるよ
伝えたくなったよ 僕が見る明日を
大丈夫だよってそう言うから 何度でも繰り返すから
伝えたくなったよ 変わらない夢を
聞いて欲しい話があるよ うなずいてくれたら嬉しいな
帰りたくなったよ 君が待つ街へ
かけがえのないその手に今 もう一度伝えたいから
帰りたくなったよ 君が待つ家に
聞いて欲しい話があるよ 笑ってくれたら嬉しいな
========================
I wanted to fill the hole in my heart so I pretended to be nice and smiled
First meetings and final farewells restlessly pile up on my shoulder
I realize regrettably how hopeless I am and that’s my loss
I can’t be stronger so I closed my eyes and put up with it
Look, I can see it now
I want to go home now, back to the city where you wait for me
Give me a big wave hello and I’ll return it just as big
I want to go home now, back to the house where you wait for me
I’ve got a story I want you to hear and I’ll be glad if it makes you smile
I’m sure I can’t count everything that’s precious to me
There might be days when I stumble but I won’t cry anymore
Look, I can see it now
I want to tell you now, all about the tomorrow I see
I’m doing just fine, I’ll keep telling you as long as it takes
I want to tell you now, all about my steadfast dream
I’ve got a story I want you to hear and I’ll be glad if you nod your approval
I want to go home now, back to the city where you wait for me
I’ll grab that irreplaceable hand now and tell you once more
I want to go home now, back to the house where you wait for me
I’ve got a story I want you to hear and I’ll be glad if it makes you smile
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
Lost voice
When you loose your voice, there are a lot of things that are not possiblle:
-calling the clinic for an appointment (or even the emergency services. Do I just keep the phone on if I faint in my apartment and they come and save me or...?)
-speaking to the receptionist through a glass door
-any interaction on the phone with friends and family
-sleeping soundly, as I need my regular intake of lemon and honey to soothe the ear and throat infection.
I am testing my voice when I wake up. I sometimes go insane thinking maybe I have gone deaf as well as I can't hear my voice. Too bad I still hear the construction across the building!
Maybe it is time I learn sign language? I had to write everything on paper for the doctor to type in his computer. Remember, they do not touch the patient in this country. This doctor was very brave though,and used the stethoscope on my back to inspect my lungs. He also tried to inspect my ears with visibly dirty instrument (he picked up from his pencil box and had like grass on it), but I frowned so bad at it he chose a clean one from the medicine box....geez! Maybe next time I will bring my own tools for the doctor to use.
I am tor est for a week (the usual advice since it is legal to miss work without a doctor's note for that amount of time), and come back if not cured. It is very re-assuring and I am once again furious as clearly all my tax money is spent somewhere else than in sound medical/health services...
But what am I doing? Ranting here won't change a thing. But then again, I lost my voice so I can't be heard.
-calling the clinic for an appointment (or even the emergency services. Do I just keep the phone on if I faint in my apartment and they come and save me or...?)
-speaking to the receptionist through a glass door
-any interaction on the phone with friends and family
-sleeping soundly, as I need my regular intake of lemon and honey to soothe the ear and throat infection.
I am testing my voice when I wake up. I sometimes go insane thinking maybe I have gone deaf as well as I can't hear my voice. Too bad I still hear the construction across the building!
Maybe it is time I learn sign language? I had to write everything on paper for the doctor to type in his computer. Remember, they do not touch the patient in this country. This doctor was very brave though,and used the stethoscope on my back to inspect my lungs. He also tried to inspect my ears with visibly dirty instrument (he picked up from his pencil box and had like grass on it), but I frowned so bad at it he chose a clean one from the medicine box....geez! Maybe next time I will bring my own tools for the doctor to use.
I am tor est for a week (the usual advice since it is legal to miss work without a doctor's note for that amount of time), and come back if not cured. It is very re-assuring and I am once again furious as clearly all my tax money is spent somewhere else than in sound medical/health services...
But what am I doing? Ranting here won't change a thing. But then again, I lost my voice so I can't be heard.
Sunday, November 23, 2008
Monday, November 17, 2008
Wednesday, November 05, 2008
Saturday, October 25, 2008
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
One eventful day
I suppose it's been a while since my brain has been challenged this much. I was on a UNIX based course today and I am even surprised I enjoye dit so much. God knows how I avoided using vi in my college years, yet there I was trying to rack my brain with the ways to edit and save a file in the damn editor. Anyway, I only retain things when it is absolutely necessary so for the next 2 days I will almost act as if I knew my way around that UNIX (s)hell.
After a morning that breezed through, an afternoon trying to understand a Solaris based sytem configuration on a full stomach and a drowsy head, I was back to my housing area...and on an impulse to buy something for a cute litle girl (Kenzah), entered a kids' clothes shop. After some difficulty, I found some cute clothes, but then after 5 more minutes I found everything cute and ended up with 7 outfits! Imagine if it were for my own kid! I was shocked. So I put everything back on the rails, and started from scratch. I seriously am not fit for this kind of things. It is much easier to buy clothes for myself. These are clothes she will grow out of in a couple of months too, so it seems like an expensive investment. Without being a parent, I now understand the tight budget they have/had to juggle with.
I got sick of trying to make a decision so ended up buying the 2 things I picked up first...I am a gut feeling person after all.
All that is elft is to be pretty for my passport photo tomorrow.
After a morning that breezed through, an afternoon trying to understand a Solaris based sytem configuration on a full stomach and a drowsy head, I was back to my housing area...and on an impulse to buy something for a cute litle girl (Kenzah), entered a kids' clothes shop. After some difficulty, I found some cute clothes, but then after 5 more minutes I found everything cute and ended up with 7 outfits! Imagine if it were for my own kid! I was shocked. So I put everything back on the rails, and started from scratch. I seriously am not fit for this kind of things. It is much easier to buy clothes for myself. These are clothes she will grow out of in a couple of months too, so it seems like an expensive investment. Without being a parent, I now understand the tight budget they have/had to juggle with.
I got sick of trying to make a decision so ended up buying the 2 things I picked up first...I am a gut feeling person after all.
All that is elft is to be pretty for my passport photo tomorrow.
Thrills down my spine
The guitar version is what'#s in my mind but th epiano interpretation of this Albeniz piece is also quite awesome (Granada, Spanish suite).
Monday, October 20, 2008
Sunday, October 12, 2008
Monday, October 06, 2008
The next piece.....
Not sure which one to choose...
1-Beethoven Sonata no8 'pathetique' 2nd movement
2-Liszt Liebestraum nocture 3
3 - Liszt Consolation no.3
4 - Tchaikovsky Op. 40 Nr. 2
Hum..considering I am missing about 20 notes..
1-Beethoven Sonata no8 'pathetique' 2nd movement
2-Liszt Liebestraum nocture 3
3 - Liszt Consolation no.3
4 - Tchaikovsky Op. 40 Nr. 2
Hum..considering I am missing about 20 notes..
Saturday, September 27, 2008
Using this pensieve...
On wednesday morning I had a bagel to remember the taste of my college years.
I also got my student card that says 'undergraduate' on it...yiikes!
My resolve to do a good job at work is wavering.
Something I picked up in 'Seirei no Moribito' this week: "When one has money, life can be the same wherever she/he goes or lives. When you don't have money, you get the opportunity to adapt to different situations." I'll have to remeber that one in case I become too needy and greedy.
Am I uncomfortable with the thought of being happy?
I also got my student card that says 'undergraduate' on it...yiikes!
My resolve to do a good job at work is wavering.
Something I picked up in 'Seirei no Moribito' this week: "When one has money, life can be the same wherever she/he goes or lives. When you don't have money, you get the opportunity to adapt to different situations." I'll have to remeber that one in case I become too needy and greedy.
Am I uncomfortable with the thought of being happy?
Monday, September 08, 2008
Confidential
Have you ever wondered why you did not choose that exciting option? Or risked everything for a new experience? When you are afraid of what people may think, how important are those people to you? Why are you lacking confidence in yourself?
I admit we shared a bottle of sparkling wine between 3 people. But we also somehow felt safe enough to confront those questions and listen to each other. it is amazing how very good looking people are unsecure about their hair, looks, behaviour or what people may think. Maybe I am just naive to only care about very few friends and family memebers opinions. Some find me fragile, strong, balanced, cold hearted, but to be honest, we only do things for ourselves anyway: selfless acts are very rare (I am sure there is an episode of Friends where Phoebe makes that statement).
To be strong is to be able to protect our loved ones...thus for your own satisfaction and happiness.
To love or to give is to see that other person smile or enjoy the gift, which is again for oneself's benefit or relief.
So really, being committed to oneself seems the viable option.
I admit we shared a bottle of sparkling wine between 3 people. But we also somehow felt safe enough to confront those questions and listen to each other. it is amazing how very good looking people are unsecure about their hair, looks, behaviour or what people may think. Maybe I am just naive to only care about very few friends and family memebers opinions. Some find me fragile, strong, balanced, cold hearted, but to be honest, we only do things for ourselves anyway: selfless acts are very rare (I am sure there is an episode of Friends where Phoebe makes that statement).
To be strong is to be able to protect our loved ones...thus for your own satisfaction and happiness.
To love or to give is to see that other person smile or enjoy the gift, which is again for oneself's benefit or relief.
So really, being committed to oneself seems the viable option.
Sunday, September 07, 2008
I feel like a woman when...
-People around me start comparing their mobile phnoe features, discussing the operating systems, gadgets and accessories they have with it...totally a guy thing! When they lend it to me to see, I have a hard time understanding how to make a phone call with it...
-the cold autumn wind lifts up my skirt and my buttocks feels the breeze...
-I spot a nice pair of jeans on a nice pair of legs and I just want to see the front of that person walking in front of me..yiikes, there's a girl walking next to him...totally jealous!
-I get into the cosmetics aisles in a pharmacy or department store. Come to think of it, we women always think we can look or be better with tons of creams and medicines on...based on how the product container looks like.
-I am getting a head massage.
-I get people around me to do what I wanted them to do and I don't feel guilty about it because I was nice.
-the cold autumn wind lifts up my skirt and my buttocks feels the breeze...
-I spot a nice pair of jeans on a nice pair of legs and I just want to see the front of that person walking in front of me..yiikes, there's a girl walking next to him...totally jealous!
-I get into the cosmetics aisles in a pharmacy or department store. Come to think of it, we women always think we can look or be better with tons of creams and medicines on...based on how the product container looks like.
-I am getting a head massage.
-I get people around me to do what I wanted them to do and I don't feel guilty about it because I was nice.
Saturday, September 06, 2008
Autumn in London
That was Trafalgar Square at the end of the Beijing olympics...August went. September has rushed in with a torrent of rain and wind. The only bright fact is I have my ticket for an island much closer to the equator...let November come.
Before that, a lot to worry about:
-Japanese interview to enroll into classes
-Products exam for work
-Saving money for that November holiday (the Japan trip fund is also accepting donations!)
-Sending those outstanding posts...ahem...
-Stop biting nails..
-Loose 20 pounds (top of mission impossible list)
-Keep my friends...
The list is tiring me. I should just go back to sleep.
Thursday, August 28, 2008
Falling in love...
The quiet moment that makes me look back and smile, is when I picture the moment I fall in love. It's usually a blurry and silent moment, because my memory erased all sounds and only remembers one beat of my heart, a single intake of air that stays frozen in time.
A crush has a scent of colonne or after-shave, and usually emotions come bursting into full fledged lust. My crushes are my source of light headedness and replaying of impossible ero-scenarios until I face reality and surprise myself day dreaming or being stupid.
That suspended moment in time when I fall for someone is the beginning of my worries. At that time I fully acknowledge my feelings for him: his pains become mine, his joys are my source of joy, etc...typical textbook cliche. Every casual time spent together becomes happiness.
I tend to forget about what I want during those happy times. I loose myself into making him happy that I sometimes erase myself. (Un?)Fortunately my tolerance is pretty low (and maybe selfishness is only dormant) so the smallest misconduct annoys me and my over-reaction is to pull back to re-assess what the relationship is giving me...Being a very idealistic person, I usually assume he reads minds. Being an unforgiving type, I have a hard time with all types of treachery.
Looking back could make me want to get back to those times, to fall in love again.
But first,
let me heal the wounds after falling...It's not all cotton buds, rose petals and feather we are falling into.
A crush has a scent of colonne or after-shave, and usually emotions come bursting into full fledged lust. My crushes are my source of light headedness and replaying of impossible ero-scenarios until I face reality and surprise myself day dreaming or being stupid.
That suspended moment in time when I fall for someone is the beginning of my worries. At that time I fully acknowledge my feelings for him: his pains become mine, his joys are my source of joy, etc...typical textbook cliche. Every casual time spent together becomes happiness.
I tend to forget about what I want during those happy times. I loose myself into making him happy that I sometimes erase myself. (Un?)Fortunately my tolerance is pretty low (and maybe selfishness is only dormant) so the smallest misconduct annoys me and my over-reaction is to pull back to re-assess what the relationship is giving me...Being a very idealistic person, I usually assume he reads minds. Being an unforgiving type, I have a hard time with all types of treachery.
Looking back could make me want to get back to those times, to fall in love again.
But first,
let me heal the wounds after falling...It's not all cotton buds, rose petals and feather we are falling into.
Monday, August 25, 2008
Some funny choreography in funny clothes
Gomen ne Juliet
Pinky
They all look 12..The moves look cool without the baggy lycra shining clothes...
Pinky
They all look 12..The moves look cool without the baggy lycra shining clothes...
After Olympics dramas
So now that I no longer can watch the Olympics at work (Tae kwon do, GRS, Synchronized swimming), I get to watch some weird Japanese series online...so I graduated from anime and dived into live actions....Sadly enough I've watched loads fo thema nd here are my 3 picks so far:
-Last Friends: about friendship and love
-Code Blue: Think ER with an helicopter (and yummy Yamapi)
-Puzzle: quite hilarious mystery series, especially the way they use English at the beginning.
Well some of them are still airing and season finales are approaching. In the meantime, I've totally lost track of what is airing in the West. I guess my head is kind of Asian oriented these days.
-Last Friends: about friendship and love
-Code Blue: Think ER with an helicopter (and yummy Yamapi)
-Puzzle: quite hilarious mystery series, especially the way they use English at the beginning.
Well some of them are still airing and season finales are approaching. In the meantime, I've totally lost track of what is airing in the West. I guess my head is kind of Asian oriented these days.
Thursday, August 07, 2008
Thoughts of a tired mind
Discipline has never been my forte. I need that peer pressure to keep striving for my own goals:going to the gym at work, repeating out loud that I need to spend more time learning Japanese, repeating out loud that I have a test coming up next week...unfortunately I also tend to say out loud that I am hungry, tired and pissed off....
There are too many things that prevent me for keeping my discipline: minimal social life (though I ate out twice this week), various series online to watch (hmm to practice my Japanese reading and listening)...
Most importantly after that weekend in Savoie, I realize I tend to enjoy the company of various people, most often very different people with completely diverse interests and personalities. I haven't yet met that one person that has all those interesting characteristics, and I know I will never meet one. It's a tough realization that is starting to sink in that maybe I will have to settle for less than everything:)
It is also a given fact that at this point I am in no way inclined to sacrifice what I want to do for anyone else's sake..except maybe family members...
When deciding on where my career is going, it is even more vague than usual. There are a lot of things I do not want to do, and even more things I would like to try. There is just not enough time in this life to have it all, hence this other frustration griping my forehead.
Being greedy sure is painful! Is it easier to make decisions for someone you love? I imagine it is because you already have an idea of what is good or would make that someone happy...in my case, I dont know what will make me happy...
There are too many things that prevent me for keeping my discipline: minimal social life (though I ate out twice this week), various series online to watch (hmm to practice my Japanese reading and listening)...
Most importantly after that weekend in Savoie, I realize I tend to enjoy the company of various people, most often very different people with completely diverse interests and personalities. I haven't yet met that one person that has all those interesting characteristics, and I know I will never meet one. It's a tough realization that is starting to sink in that maybe I will have to settle for less than everything:)
It is also a given fact that at this point I am in no way inclined to sacrifice what I want to do for anyone else's sake..except maybe family members...
When deciding on where my career is going, it is even more vague than usual. There are a lot of things I do not want to do, and even more things I would like to try. There is just not enough time in this life to have it all, hence this other frustration griping my forehead.
Being greedy sure is painful! Is it easier to make decisions for someone you love? I imagine it is because you already have an idea of what is good or would make that someone happy...in my case, I dont know what will make me happy...
Sunday, August 03, 2008
Saturday, July 26, 2008
Total Praise
For that time when you just want to sing from the top of your lungs and shiver....shiver..shiver
Friday, July 18, 2008
What's my sign again?
Because I'm out of inspiration and completely knackered from this week, here's another horoscope...mind you, I hate snakes myself.
SNAKES ARE:
Thoughtful, Wise, Shrewd, Intuitive, Guarded, Independent, Sometimes Lazy.
The Snake is the master seducer of the Chinese Zodiac. Always well-liked, Snakes are sociable yet introverted as well as intuitive and blessed with a keen aptitude for business. ('not sure about the well liked but it's true noone thingks I'm introverted')
Although Snakes may not consider money that important ('I think money is important!') , their luck and tendency to be a bit tight with their purse strings ensure they will have more money than they need ('Well, it's not like I'm stingy...and no, that last part is all false as well. I don;t seem to be able to save any money').
Snakes are far more mentally active than they are physically.(though i stopped computing squares in my sleep, I'm going to the gym now...)
They tend to analyze events before joining in. Overall Snakes have reserved dispositions and probing minds that make intellectual pursuits far more attractive to them than physical activity.('well...I have someone in mind. The problem is, it makes me dumb to have someone in mind')
At their core, Snakes are a little insecure, and can be very jealous and possessive, which can estrange both their friends and family. ('HA, totally!')
Despite their imperfections, Snakes can be alluring, munificent ('what does that word mean?')and loving. Snakes tend to trust their own intuition over the advice of others.
While sometimes they are seen as lazy, Snakes will work very hard when the need arises. They are not quitters and expect the same commitment from their partners in any venture.
Snakes could often be a little less arrogant, and develop a stronger sense of self.('well, not sure about the arrogance, since I'm often self effacing or spectator')
So there you have it, another 2min wasted in reading rubbish!
COME AGAIN....
SNAKES ARE:
Thoughtful, Wise, Shrewd, Intuitive, Guarded, Independent, Sometimes Lazy.
The Snake is the master seducer of the Chinese Zodiac. Always well-liked, Snakes are sociable yet introverted as well as intuitive and blessed with a keen aptitude for business. ('not sure about the well liked but it's true noone thingks I'm introverted')
Although Snakes may not consider money that important ('I think money is important!') , their luck and tendency to be a bit tight with their purse strings ensure they will have more money than they need ('Well, it's not like I'm stingy...and no, that last part is all false as well. I don;t seem to be able to save any money').
Snakes are far more mentally active than they are physically.(though i stopped computing squares in my sleep, I'm going to the gym now...)
They tend to analyze events before joining in. Overall Snakes have reserved dispositions and probing minds that make intellectual pursuits far more attractive to them than physical activity.('well...I have someone in mind. The problem is, it makes me dumb to have someone in mind')
At their core, Snakes are a little insecure, and can be very jealous and possessive, which can estrange both their friends and family. ('HA, totally!')
Despite their imperfections, Snakes can be alluring, munificent ('what does that word mean?')and loving. Snakes tend to trust their own intuition over the advice of others.
While sometimes they are seen as lazy, Snakes will work very hard when the need arises. They are not quitters and expect the same commitment from their partners in any venture.
Snakes could often be a little less arrogant, and develop a stronger sense of self.('well, not sure about the arrogance, since I'm often self effacing or spectator')
So there you have it, another 2min wasted in reading rubbish!
COME AGAIN....
Sunday, July 13, 2008
Highlights and favourites of my trip to Indonesia
Of course, there are so many things I learned and enjoyed during those 2 weeks. But mainly I am glad I shared those emotions with these fantastic people.
These are the times worth living for.
There were of course a whole adventure for the palate, and I am happy my stomach held everything, thanks for all the good bacterias I have accumulated all my life eating junk food on the streets.
And island hopping is definetely an exciting activity, especially when I get to see so much sun days in a row! But there were more than just beaches in Bali. Temples, crafts, so many luxurious (ahem) plants, the smell of fresh air, sensual tastes,...
I felt I was both at home and lost in the infinite universe. Time didn't stop, time didn't exist. I woke up at peace, and went to sleep content. I tried to take some actions to help the ones around me, trying not to be too much of a spectator, but really, it was also very rewarding just to watch, and feel so much emotions. I am so grateful words, a smile and warm tears are not enough to convey how I feel.
Terima kasih
These are the times worth living for.
There were of course a whole adventure for the palate, and I am happy my stomach held everything, thanks for all the good bacterias I have accumulated all my life eating junk food on the streets.
And island hopping is definetely an exciting activity, especially when I get to see so much sun days in a row! But there were more than just beaches in Bali. Temples, crafts, so many luxurious (ahem) plants, the smell of fresh air, sensual tastes,...
I felt I was both at home and lost in the infinite universe. Time didn't stop, time didn't exist. I woke up at peace, and went to sleep content. I tried to take some actions to help the ones around me, trying not to be too much of a spectator, but really, it was also very rewarding just to watch, and feel so much emotions. I am so grateful words, a smile and warm tears are not enough to convey how I feel.
Terima kasih
D'Masiv - Cinta Ini Membunuhku
Here is a soundtrack of my past vacation in Indonesia. I listened to it on the plane and it makes me so happy it makes me smile every morning when I am waiting for the trains on a cold windy platform in London.
Sunday, June 15, 2008
I Heart Robot?
Well, what a shock, after watching Zettai Kareshi, I stumble on this news:
http://news.yahoo.com/s/afp/20080615/ts_afp/lifestylenetherlandstechnologylovesexrobots_080615055138
Scary stuff...makes you think a bit about why and how we feel sometimes.
http://news.yahoo.com/s/afp/20080615/ts_afp/lifestylenetherlandstechnologylovesexrobots_080615055138
Scary stuff...makes you think a bit about why and how we feel sometimes.
Tuesday, June 10, 2008
Iznogoud or Izitgoud?
Alas, I don't have that marsupilami comics around, but for sure I was torn between fear of poisononing and will to please again this morning. Like any present I try to offer, it is always a torture before getting the approval of the recipient. Imagine me baking a 'pudding' from 3 days old bread, milk, egggs and banana, and bringing it to work for my comrades...it was still warm when it got to the office, and I was in torture thinking it is disgusting and noone will eat it (since I didn't even have a chance to taste it).
This is a torture I am enduring at each gift or offering, because I usually choose it on impulse then regret or fear for its validity or value until the actual offering: is this too much? is this enough? would it be useful? will it end in the trash? is this suitable? etc...Of course there is the joy of being able to offer something, but it is only completelly fulfilled when the recipient(s) actually enjoys it...
Why the worry? I am not sure. Maybe because I just want everything to be perfect, although i never found it easy to choose the time to give the present. So I tend to slip it or throw it at them, casually, pretending I din't care,that it is not a big deal. But strangely enough, it is quite a big deal for me...vanity? or I care so much about what people think of me after all?
Ah well, they finished the cake. I will remember to collect and use old leftover baguettes from work next time.
This is a torture I am enduring at each gift or offering, because I usually choose it on impulse then regret or fear for its validity or value until the actual offering: is this too much? is this enough? would it be useful? will it end in the trash? is this suitable? etc...Of course there is the joy of being able to offer something, but it is only completelly fulfilled when the recipient(s) actually enjoys it...
Why the worry? I am not sure. Maybe because I just want everything to be perfect, although i never found it easy to choose the time to give the present. So I tend to slip it or throw it at them, casually, pretending I din't care,that it is not a big deal. But strangely enough, it is quite a big deal for me...vanity? or I care so much about what people think of me after all?
Ah well, they finished the cake. I will remember to collect and use old leftover baguettes from work next time.
Monday, June 09, 2008
This is a man's world
Here is a typical day at work. Obviously we all try to get to our desk on time before the hordes of clients hurriedly call us on our headset(some have wireless ones and can still sound professional in the toilets). And this is why I can never be a good fiction writer because I can nver come up with these gems:
N:-Hey I got my package!
S:-Yeah? let's see, how many did you get?
N:-Hmm, two. Chocolate and banana flavour (or was it vanilla and banana?)
U:-Wow, I can't believe you spent £100= for those. In my case I just reduce the amount I eat.
Me (unaware of things):-What? What did you get?
N:-Meal replacement powder
Me:-You mean like Slim F*ast? How much? Is that the same as powder juice like K? I hope you got more than 2 flavours because you're going to not like those flavours after 3 days! (imagine 5kg of each flavour)
N:-Well, this is supposed to be a meal on its own but I will still eat dinner and maybe fruits...
S:-But you must exercise as well, running especially. how long do you run?
N:-Well I'm not too good at running
Me (very proud):-yeah you only ran 10min while I ran 20min! Come on!
S:-Hum, did you know? Clara WhatsherName has a line of lingerie now.
Me:- i dont know her
S:-Oh yeah, that's ok
E:-Who? Oh..hehehehehe
Me:-Not sure what is the news here, unless she designs lingerie for guys?
S:- EH? What?
So I just get back to work because some client wants my advice on something, then tells me my voice is really pleasant, 3 times....before I pass him on to somebody else.
U:-So mine is 20%. Hey S let me measure yours.
S:-How is it calculated?
U:-you take your waist size and your weight and you can calculate it (with a measuring tape in his hands)
Me:-Is this your BMI you are talking about?
U:-Yep
S:-How come you dont take into account the height?
U:-I don't know
Me:-Ahhhh so really I have the perfect BMI for a 1m90 person
N:-HAHAHAH so are you 1m90
Me:-I sure feel like it!
P:-Hey do you have some food, sweets, anything?
K:-Hey I am lifting 140kg now (wait or was it 40kg? I really dont know and didn't pay attention to this one)
I don't even transcribe here the talks about shagging and pulling someone, or the description of certain women...
At this point I leave the area to take some fresh air...Because I just imagined working with a lot of women, and seriously it depressed me a bit.Can you imagine that times 100, with added make up tidbits and gossips?
These guys are awesome! They give me just enough for entertainment!! And sometimes they speak in codes, making me work hard trying to decode their references, as they often refer to guys stuff, like cars, cartoons, french movies, porn movies, etc....
Today I ended up the day swearing like a low life....I guess all these testosterone rub off on me a bit...I wonder why all these aggressivity in me...Tomorrow let us all wear a skirt.
N:-Hey I got my package!
S:-Yeah? let's see, how many did you get?
N:-Hmm, two. Chocolate and banana flavour (or was it vanilla and banana?)
U:-Wow, I can't believe you spent £100= for those. In my case I just reduce the amount I eat.
Me (unaware of things):-What? What did you get?
N:-Meal replacement powder
Me:-You mean like Slim F*ast? How much? Is that the same as powder juice like K? I hope you got more than 2 flavours because you're going to not like those flavours after 3 days! (imagine 5kg of each flavour)
N:-Well, this is supposed to be a meal on its own but I will still eat dinner and maybe fruits...
S:-But you must exercise as well, running especially. how long do you run?
N:-Well I'm not too good at running
Me (very proud):-yeah you only ran 10min while I ran 20min! Come on!
S:-Hum, did you know? Clara WhatsherName has a line of lingerie now.
Me:- i dont know her
S:-Oh yeah, that's ok
E:-Who? Oh..hehehehehe
Me:-Not sure what is the news here, unless she designs lingerie for guys?
S:- EH? What?
So I just get back to work because some client wants my advice on something, then tells me my voice is really pleasant, 3 times....before I pass him on to somebody else.
U:-So mine is 20%. Hey S let me measure yours.
S:-How is it calculated?
U:-you take your waist size and your weight and you can calculate it (with a measuring tape in his hands)
Me:-Is this your BMI you are talking about?
U:-Yep
S:-How come you dont take into account the height?
U:-I don't know
Me:-Ahhhh so really I have the perfect BMI for a 1m90 person
N:-HAHAHAH so are you 1m90
Me:-I sure feel like it!
P:-Hey do you have some food, sweets, anything?
K:-Hey I am lifting 140kg now (wait or was it 40kg? I really dont know and didn't pay attention to this one)
I don't even transcribe here the talks about shagging and pulling someone, or the description of certain women...
At this point I leave the area to take some fresh air...Because I just imagined working with a lot of women, and seriously it depressed me a bit.Can you imagine that times 100, with added make up tidbits and gossips?
These guys are awesome! They give me just enough for entertainment!! And sometimes they speak in codes, making me work hard trying to decode their references, as they often refer to guys stuff, like cars, cartoons, french movies, porn movies, etc....
Today I ended up the day swearing like a low life....I guess all these testosterone rub off on me a bit...I wonder why all these aggressivity in me...Tomorrow let us all wear a skirt.
Friday, June 06, 2008
Some trip across East London...
Thursday evening, after abandonning the 7+ guys to abr hop on their own (one Mai Tai did me in), I stumbled back home, hoping to crash on my bed soon. Alas, that World War 2 blitz bomb prevented me from getting home. They were suspending the service towards my home at 21h30, and I waited with loads of people for more than 30minutes to cacth a train home, only to see one arrive, packed with smelly tired workers, unwilling to concede any cm2.
So we waited another minute for the next one to arrive half empty. A trip that would take 45min took me 2hours. And Friday morning wasn't easy either as the damned bomb still prevented trains to go throught heir usual routes. So we all took a long detour, but ended up to work. I was debating whether to catch the bus from the house directly but decided for the train, which was not too packed luckily, but would go as slow as a snail in a rainforest...yes, so that you can admire everybody else's junkyard along the railways of course!
Now you would think they probably evacuated a whole town to detonate that thing safely. Unless they just like to piss travellers off by changing their train schedules, closing train stations, and making us walk in the rain. And this eveing at 1835 was the worst time to travel through the London public tranportation as we were all caught back in time and held in unknown locations (between train stations).
None of the lines I usually take were working. And I had to backtrack myself twice to catch the bus home. That fantastic bus was super packed and even from the deck i could see the hordes of people trying to fit in a red motorized tin can. The silver lining was that I finally got to see Easy London by bus, and not just the motorway by black cab.
I suppose there are prettier areas in town, but passing all though those rundown 'villas', the old cinemas converted in bingo halls, loads of chicken joints, and even a housing development having a poem about hemoglobin and chlorophyl to emphasize the marriage of human and nature...except the whole building was in red bricks and there were no trees or plant in sight....adios chlorophyl! Besides,given the amount of sun in this area of the planet, only the moss growing on top of bus stops can claim to use chlorophyl.
About 40min by bus and I was finally dropped not far away from home...not sure if the blitz bomb has been safely removed, but with the amount of water dropping from the skies, we can only hope it's been drowned otherwise.
I suppose I will stay happily at home, cleaning up glasses and planting undersea trees for the future.
So we waited another minute for the next one to arrive half empty. A trip that would take 45min took me 2hours. And Friday morning wasn't easy either as the damned bomb still prevented trains to go throught heir usual routes. So we all took a long detour, but ended up to work. I was debating whether to catch the bus from the house directly but decided for the train, which was not too packed luckily, but would go as slow as a snail in a rainforest...yes, so that you can admire everybody else's junkyard along the railways of course!
Now you would think they probably evacuated a whole town to detonate that thing safely. Unless they just like to piss travellers off by changing their train schedules, closing train stations, and making us walk in the rain. And this eveing at 1835 was the worst time to travel through the London public tranportation as we were all caught back in time and held in unknown locations (between train stations).
None of the lines I usually take were working. And I had to backtrack myself twice to catch the bus home. That fantastic bus was super packed and even from the deck i could see the hordes of people trying to fit in a red motorized tin can. The silver lining was that I finally got to see Easy London by bus, and not just the motorway by black cab.
I suppose there are prettier areas in town, but passing all though those rundown 'villas', the old cinemas converted in bingo halls, loads of chicken joints, and even a housing development having a poem about hemoglobin and chlorophyl to emphasize the marriage of human and nature...except the whole building was in red bricks and there were no trees or plant in sight....adios chlorophyl! Besides,given the amount of sun in this area of the planet, only the moss growing on top of bus stops can claim to use chlorophyl.
About 40min by bus and I was finally dropped not far away from home...not sure if the blitz bomb has been safely removed, but with the amount of water dropping from the skies, we can only hope it's been drowned otherwise.
I suppose I will stay happily at home, cleaning up glasses and planting undersea trees for the future.
Saturday, May 24, 2008
How to let go?
By running till I'm out of breath
After eating a box of Phish Food ice cream on sale
Or by practicing that scale till my elbows and ears hurt
And I can still phantom play the piece in the train
By getting lost into idiomatic expressions in different languages
and wrapping my head around kanji symbols
Yet...
My longing remains.
After eating a box of Phish Food ice cream on sale
Or by practicing that scale till my elbows and ears hurt
And I can still phantom play the piece in the train
By getting lost into idiomatic expressions in different languages
and wrapping my head around kanji symbols
Yet...
My longing remains.
Sunday, May 18, 2008
Facial hair festival in Notting Hill
I ended up sampling some gypsy music at the Notting Hill Art Club, where the Transiberian Marching Band was playing. And since they were having this revolutionary festival, we tried out some facial outfit.
Thursday, May 15, 2008
Sonata in A minor (op.42)
So here is Diane Walsh playing the piece I am trying to learn these days: my favourite Schubert from now on.
So, this piece has 7 pages and i finally started learning page 3..hehehe, I am also practicing the finger jumps..hmmm and I am missing some high and low notes but hey, I can hear the sound in my head and hopefully my fingers also will remeber these notes...GAMBARIMASU YO.
So, this piece has 7 pages and i finally started learning page 3..hehehe, I am also practicing the finger jumps..hmmm and I am missing some high and low notes but hey, I can hear the sound in my head and hopefully my fingers also will remeber these notes...GAMBARIMASU YO.
Wednesday, May 07, 2008
Spring in Panam
It's been a while since I felt the warmth of a sping sun, and an hour south of Londonium was very much sunny as the season was well advanced. I re-disocvered Notre Dame from the outside ins; ate gyros, crepes, kaiten sushi, pomme de pain sandwich, daloyau ice cream, macarons, and lazied up in Luxembourg garden like in the old times. Even managed to get my dose of Louvre for probably another decade. It probably helped to pretend to be a tourguide for this tourist.
It was a bit nostalgic and I sometimes felt 14 again at times...how strange!
Monday, April 21, 2008
My 'secret' garden...
It is secret because noone knows what is in those 2 pots: after planting some grains on sunday, every morning I wake up excited that maybe some magic happened and I will see some new little green plants emerge from the brownish dirt! I am even tempted to do the same dance as in the anime となりのトトロ (Tonari no Totoro). Except I have to wake up at 6am these days so really, the only dance I manage to do is to not to sleep on the toilet...heheh
In any case, now that I have proved myself in the rearing of plants that don't die upon my presence, I am getting adventurous and trying on to grow things that I could eat...of course I like pretty things too, such as the pink pale tulips...
But all my efforts are always to fill my stomach...
Saturday, April 19, 2008
Sunday, April 13, 2008
Homesick
So i got hooked on a japanese tv series and rediscovered music pieces heard decades ago:the power of an orchestra,the versality of piano, the poignant violin...am homesick of the past.
Wednesday, April 09, 2008
'I fought the war, but the war won'
After a girls' night out, where I stuffed myself with well deserved lobster, given I swam like a Sharks survivor for 20min, it was time to test the fuzzy feeling left by the dessert wine Vin Santo. I must stay I got the buzz, with red cheeks and easy smiles, and a warm feeling of time wisely spent.
Unfortunately my route was troubled by public transport and its users. I was peacefully digesting my giant load of food, when some stereotypical kid in hoodie, baggy pants and arrogant way of walking got in the coach, stood next to me near the door, finished rolling up his herbs, lit it up, took a puff and exhale the disgusting smell of hash...well, in my head I was cursing his unconceived descendants (ie wishing for his low fertility), while wishing for his puff to choke him. So in my sweetest voice, I said:
-'excuse me, could you please turn that off. I am allergic'
I was almost hoping he was blind to not see the big red non smoking sign all over the carriage. Or maybe he didn't understand English? But then this punk asnwered while trying to shamefully extinguish his poison.
-'you should have stopped me before I lit it up'
Maybe I should have just taken the whole think and extinguished it with my foot. So I told him he knows he shouldn't be smoking in the tube anyway. To that he mumbled something about being 'strict'...really, I could have mumbled something about 'respect'. But I was most amazed noone else actually reacted when he lit up that cigarette!
At the next stop, some people got off at the station so some seats became vacant, so I put some distance between myself and the 'may he die painfully' kid. And sure enough, he lit up his thing again! And once more, noone among the 30 people in the carriage said nothing. So I got up and left the damn carriage!
Maybe I am making a big deal of this, but it is not a good sign when noone other than my 1m50 person to stand up to a kid disturbing your well being in a public transportation.
I well remember that proverb we put in school for a cultural event:'it takes a village to raise a kid'..well this community I am living in is not raising the kids very well...
Unfortunately my route was troubled by public transport and its users. I was peacefully digesting my giant load of food, when some stereotypical kid in hoodie, baggy pants and arrogant way of walking got in the coach, stood next to me near the door, finished rolling up his herbs, lit it up, took a puff and exhale the disgusting smell of hash...well, in my head I was cursing his unconceived descendants (ie wishing for his low fertility), while wishing for his puff to choke him. So in my sweetest voice, I said:
-'excuse me, could you please turn that off. I am allergic'
I was almost hoping he was blind to not see the big red non smoking sign all over the carriage. Or maybe he didn't understand English? But then this punk asnwered while trying to shamefully extinguish his poison.
-'you should have stopped me before I lit it up'
Maybe I should have just taken the whole think and extinguished it with my foot. So I told him he knows he shouldn't be smoking in the tube anyway. To that he mumbled something about being 'strict'...really, I could have mumbled something about 'respect'. But I was most amazed noone else actually reacted when he lit up that cigarette!
At the next stop, some people got off at the station so some seats became vacant, so I put some distance between myself and the 'may he die painfully' kid. And sure enough, he lit up his thing again! And once more, noone among the 30 people in the carriage said nothing. So I got up and left the damn carriage!
Maybe I am making a big deal of this, but it is not a good sign when noone other than my 1m50 person to stand up to a kid disturbing your well being in a public transportation.
I well remember that proverb we put in school for a cultural event:'it takes a village to raise a kid'..well this community I am living in is not raising the kids very well...
Sunday, April 06, 2008
Wednesday, April 02, 2008
If I had £2 000 000....
Yesterday I was sleepily pressing the button on the watermachine to get some hot tea at work before settling on my desk, when a colleague from the English team happily said: 'I bet if you were given £2 000 000 you'll be more awake and happier'....
Of course it took me about 9 years to realize he was speaking to me. Then another 8hours to register what he said. I already had my sleepy smile on my face, then andwered:'well, I don't know what I'll do with that money'. Then another 27 seconds later, with my hot camomille tea in hand, my head cleared up a bit, as he was telling me about investment, and I had to listen and try to understand what he was saying...so eventually I was forced into a conversation where my main participation was to say:'I'd have too much to do I'll be even more stressed, and let's face it, the more I have the greedier I tend to become and so I won't probably enjoy it more than now.'
After that 5 minutes conversation, I was fully awake, and worked hard until 17:30....it's only coming back home after gym, reviewing for my exam once last time (exam which I really hope I passed because I am not confident in my answers anymore)...well, after all that, when I was slipping into unconscienceness of my dear sleep, my last thought was that indeed, I wouldn't know what to do first if I get £2 000 000.
Now I think it's a bit odd, because I am sure a lot of people will have an aswer right away, of their plans, their first purchases, or investments...Is it because I don't know the value of the amount? Or because I have no plans, no objectives? Or maybe I don't aim for that amount of money so that I haven't spent it already in my mind?
It's not the lact of projects that actually stops me. It is the fact that the possession of that amount would make me happier for a long time that I challenge. Upon reception, of course I will be overjoyed to see the chance to live some projects. But it doesn't mean there won't be any sacrifices. And those still would hurt....
Because I've always beena big spender, my only chance of being happy in the morning would be to wake up very late, and getting a very sunny and warm weather...and being with people I love...how sentimental...now I guess £2 000 000 could make that happen...maybe...
In the meantime, I have to loose weight and continue running like a sloppy hippopotamus on a treadmill...may my knees not buckle and my back keep me vertical...
Of course it took me about 9 years to realize he was speaking to me. Then another 8hours to register what he said. I already had my sleepy smile on my face, then andwered:'well, I don't know what I'll do with that money'. Then another 27 seconds later, with my hot camomille tea in hand, my head cleared up a bit, as he was telling me about investment, and I had to listen and try to understand what he was saying...so eventually I was forced into a conversation where my main participation was to say:'I'd have too much to do I'll be even more stressed, and let's face it, the more I have the greedier I tend to become and so I won't probably enjoy it more than now.'
After that 5 minutes conversation, I was fully awake, and worked hard until 17:30....it's only coming back home after gym, reviewing for my exam once last time (exam which I really hope I passed because I am not confident in my answers anymore)...well, after all that, when I was slipping into unconscienceness of my dear sleep, my last thought was that indeed, I wouldn't know what to do first if I get £2 000 000.
Now I think it's a bit odd, because I am sure a lot of people will have an aswer right away, of their plans, their first purchases, or investments...Is it because I don't know the value of the amount? Or because I have no plans, no objectives? Or maybe I don't aim for that amount of money so that I haven't spent it already in my mind?
It's not the lact of projects that actually stops me. It is the fact that the possession of that amount would make me happier for a long time that I challenge. Upon reception, of course I will be overjoyed to see the chance to live some projects. But it doesn't mean there won't be any sacrifices. And those still would hurt....
Because I've always beena big spender, my only chance of being happy in the morning would be to wake up very late, and getting a very sunny and warm weather...and being with people I love...how sentimental...now I guess £2 000 000 could make that happen...maybe...
In the meantime, I have to loose weight and continue running like a sloppy hippopotamus on a treadmill...may my knees not buckle and my back keep me vertical...
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